Self-Devpt. Nuggets™

If you’re a parent in Nigeria, you really – and I mean REALLY(!) – need to read the story told by Ayodeji Adeyeye, about the traumatizing JAMB examination centre experience, his 2 daughters had during the recent 2014 exams.

Unless you’re like one of the adults he says orchestrated the massive exam malpractices he described, you’ll be just as outraged as other right thinking adults who have read it.

Adeyeye had no reason to tell a lie. He had nothing to gain…

What’s more, I have access to comments by another responsible adult, from a different Facebook discussion thread, which lend credence to Adeyeye’s claims.

That, and the testimony of other Nigerians living in Nigeria, was enough to convince me this was the truth.

In his Facebook post, Adeyeye narrates how, that fateful morning, he gave his young girls N2, 000 naira each, for refreshments at the exam venue.

He however noted that their older brother who was taking them down, had pointed out that the money he’d given them would be inadequate.

Being he, being uninitiated in the new ways of doing things at the exams, had argued that the money would be more than adequate for their needs. After all, they would only need to buy snacks to eat!

How wrong he turned out to be.

As I read the story, I could almost not contain my outrage!

Adeyeye said his girls were first of all met with a request to pay what was called “Marching Ground” to enter the exam hall.

The fee was N500 (Five Hundred Naira).

But that was mild…

The demand for N5, 000 (Five Thousand Naira) to get them connected to an “aide” via mobile phone who would supply answers to the questions, which followed soon shook them up!

The girls could not pay the requested fee. So the invigilator’s put marks on their papers meant to indicated they were caught engaging in exams malpractice!

Can you believe that?? Those who did NOT do wrong being given punishment meant for those who did?? Unbelievable!

Now, if you’re wondering where the policemen were, when all this was going on, Ayo tell us that they dutifully came in, collected their “allocation” of money and left.

And the invigilator’s…?

Well, they were the ones coordinating all of the action, from the front……while the parents of the candidates, we are told, monitored and controlled proceedings from right outside the examination hall!

Click here to read Adeyeye’s original narrative.

What many who read this story may not immediately appreciate…

You see, there a lot of damage being done to kids who are exposed to this kind of experience – on both sides…

a. For those kids like Adeyeye’s whose parents challenge them to study diligently, and take exams without cheating, frustration is bound to be their lot.

For instance, they are likely to get negative attention from invigilator’s, and peers who play the game…

b. For the kids whose parents have coached them to cut corners in this manner, they are bound to develop a warped sense of right and wrong.

And hard work or honesty will certainly make little or no meaning to them.

What’s more, since they’ll see their parents actively conniving with unscrupulous others to help them cheat in exams, such kids will grow up expecting such support all through school, and even life!

And they will in turn teach their own kids to be the same too, since they would not know better.

But that’s not the worst…

You see, society will gradually feel the negative multiplier effects of such happenings – as in today’s Nigeria. That;s why so called graduates cannot speak comprehensible English. It’s also why most of them are incapable of meeting the lowest employer standards for recruitment.

CEOs of multinationals in Nigeria have often cried out in frustration, after interviewing supposed First Class and Second Class Upper degree holders whose performances call their credentials to question!

The irony is that the misguided kids go around feeling they deserve to get the best jobs and opportunities. And their crooked parents (who often got where they are through similar methods), often help them open the needed doors.

But anytime they meet the kids of upright parents, crooked people feel threatened.

It happens all the time…

The crooked person whose credentials are phony naturally feels threatened by competent others. S/he knows given a level platform based on merit, such persons will outdo him/her.

So s/he will go out of his/her way to bring such persons down, so they not longer constitute a viable threat to his/her ambitions.

In other words, if YOUR child meets such a crooked person s/he would instantly be perceived as a threat to be eliminated (I’m assuming here that YOU, are one of the good guys…like I AM…)

So, no matter how nice your child tries to be, the fraudulent kids and their parents will never be comfortable around him/her.

As happened to Adeyeye’s kids, who now have to look forward to next year’s exams through no fault of theirs, your child may therefore be doomed to failure within the existing social setup in Nigeria.

My argument is that if you are not prepared to go crooked like those mentioned above, need to HELP their kids prepare better for the REAL world.

You will do this by equipping them with the knowledge and skills to flourish regardless of attempts to use existing systems to derail their progress.

By this I mean, rather than send them abroad (which I do not subscribe to, and many cannot afford), you can deliberately prepare your kids much earlier for LIFE outside school.

Formal schooling today needs to include life skills coaching.

Fewer jobs await school leavers at any level. And that’s why more and more people are finishing schooling and finding cause to launch careers in various vocational fields.

Today, it’s best that kids are introduced much earlier in life, to knowledge and skills they can use to earn a good living.

This does not stop a child from finishing school.

But it makes him/her better prepared to deal with the real possibility that formal schooling may NOT be enough to achieve success in larger society.

Take it from me, dear reader. Nowhere is the above statement truer, than in Nigeria.

No matter how intelligent your child is academically, today’s world makes it imperative that s/he acquire the know-how to earn EXTRA income using a variety of skills, within and/or outside paid employment.

You cannot foresee what is in store for your child. But you can prepare him/her better to deal with challenges that life and society will throw at him/her.

I’m doing that for my kids.

In past parenting articles I’ve shared several true stories/examples e.g. how I taught them to use pineapple peels to make a drink and cakes (baked without using an oven) which they sell.

You can do the same too.

Prepare yourself, by paying attention to what INTERESTS and TALENTS your kids have. Then learn how to match them with what WORKS in the real world, so they arrive adulthood with income earning abilities to succeed in spite of the antics of society’s "bad guys"!

Your kids are your most valuable investment in life.

Do NOT let society’s bad guys make you lose them!