Self-Devpt. Nuggets™

I know this topic may sound alarming for some people. However, I urge you to read this article with an open mind. I do not offer criticisms below. Instead I provide insight based on my personal experiences from my growing up years till now. In addition, I share IDEAS about how I’m preparing my kids to do a better job of succeeding in the real world(outside the secure/controlled environment of paid employment) earlier in life, than I did.

(Published online: 26th April, 2012)

Preamble

My mother retired as a Montessori trained teacher after 30 years. Yet, persons who know me well today, will attest to the fact that I have ALWAYS felt that “Schools kill creativity”, for YEARS. Especially since leaving school and going into the real world, as an adult. It would appear that Sir Ken Robinson also has issues with schools: see http://www.ted.com/talks/ken_robinson_says_schools_kill_creativity.html. Of course some of us know Robert Kiyosaki also faults our schooling system in his best seller titled “If You Want To Be Rich and Happy, Don’t Go To School?“

You see, I am product of the traditional school system. Over the past 2 decades, I have come to realise that our school systems “condition” people to NOT be able to maximally exploit their innate creativity as INSTINCTIVELY as it comes to them.

It is this realisation, that makes me focus MORE energy, on giving my kids what I call an “Experiential Real-World Relevant Education” today . The key to being creative is to be UNAFRAID to be wrong or to make mistakes.

Another requirement is that you must view life with the same wonder and awe that a child does – even after you become an adult. Don’t try to stifle your natural urge to express excitement about the unique discoveries that occur to you. Otherwise, you’ll fail to follow them through.

I KNOW all of this to be TRUE, and RIGHT, from years of following what I was told, going to school and THEN getting into the real world, and feeling VERY lost. While in paid employment, most of what I learned in formal schooling helped – to a point. However, when I became self-employed, and entered the real world, where almost no fair play rules or controls exist, I realised that formal schooling did little to prepare me for the real world.

The lessons I have learned about the fact that schools kill creativity, now guide me as a parent today.

Today, my older kids especially, are more aware of the real world, than their peers. And they are being coached to appreciate the need to develop real world relevant competence, at the same time as they attend school.

As often as possible, I provide them DETAILED insight about how I have had to struggle to find my place in the real world of my society (outside the controlled environment of paid employment) IN SPITE of having received – and excelling at – formal schooling.

But that’s not all. They also get TO HEAR TRUE STORIES of failure and triumph from their father. Nothing is hidden from my kids. They know about all the failures I have had right back to when I got suspended as a prefect in secondary school at age 16.

The purpose is to make them understand that people CAN fail or make mistakes, and STILL bounce back and go on to succeed. In other words, there’s no need to go around trying to avoid being wrong.

Then I seize every opportunity that presents itself, to equip them with the mental attitude, knowledge and skills to cope with the REAL WORLD…to balance out the one-sided learning they get in school.

For instance, I sometimes ask my eldest son to join me in listening to – and discussing – news reports about political development in society. I also made him start reading Ken Saro Wiwa’s books when he was 10 years old. And we would discuss what happened to Ken, why it did, etc. The interactions make them develop a higher aptitude for thinking/reasoning. Most importantly, by letting them engage you intellectually, you help them develop self-confidence in relating with adults very early on in life.

I follow a lot of the ideas advocated by Robert Kiyosaki. My kids (especially my sons) accompany me to the Computer Village, the bank and other places, and whatever I do there, they are made to try their hands at. I still recall bank officer sometimes giving me strange looks as I explained the process of filling a deposit slip to my 3 boys, and got one to count out the money, and hand to the teller, while the other picked out the pink copy and put in the box provided on the counter.

More recently at the computer village, a trader asked “Oga, you wan buy monitor for them?” (Translation: “Sir, do you want to buy them a monitor?”) as I stood explaining to my son and daughter the type of – second hand/London used monitors (flat screen etc) that were on display. My response to him was “No be today. Dem just dey learn work, so that when time reach, una no go fit sell baroof monitor for them“(Translation: “Not today. They’re learning the ropes, so you guys won’t be able to sell them fake ones when they return to make purchases on their own in future”). The trader and his on looking friends burst out laughing.

Schools Kill Creativity, But Not If You Help Your Child Develop An Adventurous Spirit

In the Tayo Solagbade clan, we are very nature and agriculture friendly. Their mother is not so keen on relating that closely with nature, but I’ve managed to infect the kids with my enthusiasm for that kind of life.

My kids have been taught to:

1. Find/catch earthworms by locating the earthworm casts (something I learned by reading up on the net!);

2. Handle crabs by hand (as shown in the picture) – and that includes my daughter. They know how to cook them; The also know how to handle rabbits. My second son once caught an injured rabbit in my sister-in-law’s compound at Omole phase 1, and I took it to the vet. We brought it back, but some months later, we visited and learnt it died from cold during the rain. This happened because her kids were too scared to let the rabbit indoors when the rains got too heavy.

My second son shows off his newly acquired skills in handling crabs. I got into trouble while attending Government College Ojo back in 1980 for bringing crabs, and turtles home from a fishing settlement my rascally friend took me. I learnt how to catch crabs then. His 12 year old brother seems to be saying “Eeew” while grappling with this BIG boy crab. That’s NOT how he acted when it was time to eat them though [Notice the smaller one “running” loose behind him. ]

NB: You can view larger versions of these pictures HERE

3. Watch movies selectively, and pay attention to picking up useful knowledge about life and other cultures from conversations and information in the movies they watch. I am living proof that you can get a lot of useful experience for use in interacting with people from other parts of the world, by doing just this. Without having ever left this country back in paid employment, I frequently QUICKLY developed great friendships with people from Cameroon, Kenya, Belgium, Ireland, Scotland, England, and later Holland, Japan, Argentina and Spain, because I knew stuff about their languages or cultures that most of my country men did not.

[NB: I’m still battling to get them to develop a passion for reading non-school stuff e.g. both fiction and non fiction books – especially the eldest. That was how I built my vocabulary when I was a teenager. I spent every kobo I had buying all kinds of novels and books, and devouring them. For now, I get a lot of upward eye rolling when I try to get them to do this with MANY books I have already bought. But to facilitate the process, I enrolled the eldest in manual typing school (YES, I mean a manual typewriter) for 6 months. He completed that and now works on a typing tutor on the laptop – doing tests typing new words. I am hoping he will pick up some of those words, as he does his typing.

Update (Tue 25th Sept. 2012): It’s exciting to be able to report that they’ve recently broken through the mental barrier of not wanting to read non-school stuff. Last weekend I challenged them to take turns in reading one chapter from Chinua Achebe’s amazing “Things Fall Apart” and/or two other American fiction novels. I set the ball rolling by reading out from Chapter 1 of Achebe’s book to them. They loved it, but when I asked who would go next, they told me they were more interested in reading the American children novels – one titled “Later Gator” and another titled “Animorphs“.

It turned out that they’d started reading those 2 books in their free time – and had gotten hooked. I gave in, but made it clear they would STILL have to read “Things Fall Apart”. I said to them: “Come to think of it, Achebe is a Nigerian by birth who is highly regarded – and has lived in the USA for years now. How can you NOT want to read the book that made him famous, I asked?!“….:-) On a more serious note, as you can see from this update, even when it appears you’re not getting through to them, it’s important to keep in mind that kids do HEAR what you tell them. And if you keep at it – especially if they SEE you practice what you preach – they WILL follow your advice, eventually.]

Here he is on a visit with me to Multilinks office at Motorways in Alausa, Ikeja. Believe it or not, he wa actually doing a practical assignment of noting the modem types, phone types and prices listed for each, which we then discussed. Like I told him, people will appreciate you if you prove to be well informed. Let’s say Grandpa or a friend of his says he’s trying to find out how much a multilinks modem costs…? Get it ? I’ve made valuable friends using this strategy many times in the past. It really works – people will develop a liking for you, if you they notice you often provide them with USEFUL/TIMELY information.

My 3 sons in particular are VERY daring. They rescue injured birds, bring them home, nurse them to recovery, then we release them – some die though. We use syringes to feed them milk and drugs purchased from the pharmacy.

Day 1 – Bird-fell from a tree nest. My kids rescued it and brought it home. We got a syringe, and some drugs for her (with guidance from the vet). It recovered a little, but eventually died. Few days later(before it died)…My daughter froze when her brother placed the bird on her shoulder. But later on she grew confident enough to pick it up herself.

NB: You can view larger versions of these pictures HERE

We have a cat as member of our closely knit clan, and she joined us when I rescued her as an injured kitten on a busy road, very late on one rainy night. She had to be treated for weeks, for fleas (using “Ultrum Powder – a perfumed Flea & Tick Treatment”), and flesh wounds. Later we got her vaccinated. Dr. Folorunsho, my vet doctor friend has always been helpful with providing advice on home remedies or cheap antibiotics at odd times of the day!

She’s a BIG girl now, our cat. When I rescued her last September as a badly injured kitten, with a severe respiratory infection, she fit neatly into the palm of my hands! The kids LOVE her silly. We once visited my parents and took the cat with us. Something scared the cat as we got down and she scampered into an uncompleted building. Thinking she would come out later, we went in to my parent’s. By the time we came out, she was still nowhere to be found, so we left – the kids were all downcast. It was like someone had died! Thankfully, one week later, when I visited my parents again, a security guard informed me of a cat meowing as if lost in the compound he was guarding. He was scared of cats, and was visibly relieved when I called out the cats name and she ran out to meet me. She was dirty and obviously very hungry. My mother quickly made a her a bowl of milk. I left for home earlier than planned . We had a celebration at home that night!

NB: You can view larger versions of these pictures HERE

We have had visits from GIANT (and I do me that) monitor lizards from the vacant plot next door. We caught/kept it for days, while the kids “studied” it. (I did not own a Blackberry at the time, so no pictures of it). My visiting sister-in-law almost jumped out of here skin the day she saw it

Today, we have photos of them handling and examining flat backed millipedes, toads, earth worms etc.

This is a flat backed millipede – the boys found it “walking around” one morning, and another non-formal, unplanned, totally spontaneous Integrated Science practical class began :–) Interesting insect from over in the bushy plot gets caught by the boys and the rush to get the Blackberry from me, to take a picture of it. The flat backed millipede:.We poked it a little, and it rolled up into a ball. The stuff from the textbooks in our backyard! We discussed how many legs per segment it has compared to a centipede.. My 10 year old son’s palm holding another visitor from the bushy next door undeveloped plot: A young/small toad with characteristic “warts”. As usual, after a day or two, we let them all go.

NB: You can view larger versions of these pictures HERE

If You Do It Right, It Will PAY OFF!

It’s important to let kids develop an adventurous spirit. That’s the key to building creativity. The mind must be trained to work “unfettered”. Any child, who enjoys such freedom, will develop instinctive creativity. I have lost count of the number of times I have come back home to get excitedly told by the kids of how one or more of them “fixed” something that was broken or damaged in the house.

Sometimes, when the cat falls ill, by the time I get home they inform me that they’ve administered the “ml” of xyz drug that Dr. Folorunsho asked us to give it the last time it had similar symptoms. It goes without saying, in this second instance, that I warn them against self-medicating.
However, it’s great to see they have developed such actively independent thinking skills already. Those are essential skills required for succeeding in the real world, that rarely get taught in school.

Final Words: Schools Kill Creativity – But You CAN Protect Your Child

I am sure you understand the purpose here: Look for as many opportunities as possible, to give your kids useful real-world relevant experiences. That way you’ll better prepare them to stand on their own, as competent adults, later in life.

Success in today’s world is no longer just about getting good grades and obeying adults. If the truth be told, those attributes used to be more relevant to the industrial age, when companies had huge demand for “employees”. Not so today. The reality is that more and more people in the 21st century, are having to think of doing something on their own, or on a part time basis, to meet their needs. And our schools don’t teach much that can help with THAT.

Success in this new world ORDER requires creative and innovative thinking.

The first thing our schools do is to kill curiosity in our kids, by making the need to be like others a priority. Any child that refuses to conform gets castigated or even ostracized. So, at a very early age our schools BUILD FEAR of being different into the minds of our kids. And once fear dominates a person’s thinking, creativity is forced to take a very REMOTE back seat.

When you think about it, you’ll realise this is true. Consider some of the people who history today acknowledges for bringing about the greatest creations or innovations. Many are those who either did NOT go to school (Henry Ford), or who dropped out (Bill Gates)…or who did badly in school (Edison and Einstein)?

I’ll be writing more on this in future. But let me admonish you today, to start paying more attention to implement some form of “Home Schooling”, for your kids, even if part-time. If you really love them, you will do this. It’s the best possible way to prepare them to succeed in today’s world!

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