Self-Devpt. Nuggets™

We send our kids to school because we want them to get an education. Judging from our own experiences, a good education will – among other benefits – equip them with the ability to independently discern what is useful from the sea of solicited & unsolicited advice they will be exposed to as they grow up. This article explains how you can also help them understand that no human being is all knowing: so they can avoid getting misled in school, or in life!

Why A Good Foundation In Education Is Important

A teenage girl who has attended sex education classes is likely to be more alert to the potential dangers (e.g Sexually Transmitted Infections) and likely consequences (unwanted pregnancy) of engaging in unprotected pre marital sex.

That awareness will make her opt for protected sex, if at all she chooses to have pre marital sex. And if the means for having protected sex (e.g condom) is unavailable, she’ll know enough to say no, even when her partner pressures her or tries to sweet talk her into giving in.

Once a good educational foundation is laid for a child, she’s likely to actively pursue avenues to build on it to improve herself.

With diligence she will eventually arrive a level of intellectual competence close to, or possibly above that of her parents and/or other adults.

Some Parents Apparently Don’t Want That!

Some people who today are parents were sent to graduate school by parent(s) with little or no education.

When they graduated, they generally found their education conferred a unique advantage on them.

Among other benefits, they became thought leaders in their homes and societies, whose opinions were respected and contributions valued.

Now, ironically, there are some people who had educationally accomplished parents send them to school.

But they soon discovered that their academic accomplishments were not enough to make their parent(s) accept them as being intellectually competent!

One example. I once overheard a 70 year old retired consultant tell his 38 year old son (who is himself a practicing consulting professional) as follows:

“You can never know more than I do on any subject, because I came to this world before you!”

The son was understandably shocked to hear that, as was I.

And he replied:

“But Dad, why did you bother making me go through the hassle of getting a degree, if you knew you would not be willing to accept that I can actually be equally or more knowledgeable about issues, especially in my areas of interest or specialisation?”

The old man retorted “The fact that you’ve obtained a degree does not mean you can know more than me!”

The son shook his head sadly and threw up his hands in exasperation.

Demonstrate To Your Child That No One Needs a Monopoly of Wisdom!

I once read a quote that said “you can learn how not to be a bad boss by studying one”.

My experiences and observations from my 7 year sojourn in paid employment tell me that statement is true.

The above mentioned father and son exchange proved quite instructive for me. Indeed, It made a very great impact on me.

I learnt a powerful lesson from it, about how to succeed as a parent by refusing to claim a monopoly over knowledge or wisdom.
the ability to independently discern what is useful from the sea of advice they will be exposed to as they grow up.

And to ensure I do not fail, I’ve drummed it into my kids’ heads that no human being, least of all me, their father has a monopoly of wisdom on any subject.

To make such a claim amounts to being recklessly arrogant and irresponsible with one’s utterances. Even worse, impressionable children who witness such acts may be misled into thinking that is the right way to think and speak. And they could end up upsetting others they relate with.

I strongly believe one of the greatest gifts kids can be given, is the understanding that they do not need to prove perpetually that they are smart, by claiming to know more than everyone else.

We can help our kids develop this understanding by acting as responsible role models on a daily basis, and letting them know the value they will derive from emulating us.