Self-Devpt. Nuggets™

Who are you taking advice from in your business or personal life? Every day in Nigeria, and I am sure all over the world as well, people find themselves on the receiving end of advice from speakers, writers, presenters etc. On radio, TV, newspapers, the web, tons of advices are offered by (mostly) well meaning "experts".

But I cannot help periodically wondering about where some of those I hear dish out advice – especially about how to succeed IN NIGERIA – get their ideas from!

I have said it in past writings, and I am saying it again: The rules for success in developed societies, do NOT work as well out here.

Why? Simple: We are a nation of MANIPULATORS . We do not believe in following laid down guidelines to achieving a set goal. We are not prepared to nurture ourselves to develop needed competencies to achieve success. We always want to have an unfair advantage – to win, no matter how.

That’s why for instance, we got found out to be AGE cheats in the FIFA age group competitions. For instance, towards the 2009 U-17 world cup, the country had to endure the embarrassment of being told the tests conducted on our selected team members revealed about 18 of them were over aged!

And that was NOT a one-off occurrence. It goes way back.

If you doubt me, I’ll let you in one a little secret of mine: Nigeria has been age-cheating for a long time – at least as far back as 1983.

I say this because I played active competitive handball from school to state level for over 10 years (1983 to 1993), and during that time, I found myself in age group teams playing alongside individuals MUCH older than the maximum allowed age limits.

One example. Following my performance in the 1985 Kwara secondary schools state Handball competition finals, I was invited to join the Kwara state team in camp for the 1985 National Sports Festival. Towards the start of the competition, the coach asked each player for his age.

When I told him I was 15, he retorted "No, I mean what is your REAL age?".

Before I could respond, some of my team mates told him, "Coach, that’s his real age". The man looked me over in surprise, apparently because he thought my 5ft 11inches height suggested I would be older than that.

The intention, as I would later learn, was to find out how far above the 18 year maximum age limit I was, so he could tell me what under-18 "official" age he would put on the team list to be submitted .

I will also NOT forget how (in 1983, I think) I got dropped from the state team that went to the World Youth Championships in Sweden and Denmark. This was because the coach saw me in the line up for pictures to be taken for use in preparing our international passports, and pulled me out, saying "Ah, you are too tall".

I got replaced by a colleague who was smaller in stature, even though older than I was!

I look back now, and realise that THAT was (probably) why 3 Nigerian state teams kept winning those World Youth Handball competitions (sweeping first, second and third positions annually!) back then. We were fielding over aged players, who naturally over ran their much younger counterparts from other countries!

So, you see, we’ve been doing this age-cheating in sports thing for a long time.

It is against the back drop of all this that I wonder where all our wonderful "advice-givers" get their ideas from.

For heaven’s sake, how can anyone tell young Nigerians to DARE TO DREAM, when almost EVERYTHING in this society TELLS them VERY often, it’s not how good you are, that determines if you get what you want in life HERE in
Nigeria.

Instead, it is – among others things:

(a) where you are from in the country

(b) who you know in a position of influence

(c) how much money you have

(d) how much of what you
have you are willing to give up, no matter how unfair that may be to YOU.

Consider this: Five Nigerian bank MDs got hammered few years back, following the crisis in the banking industry, when it was found that they had given out UNSECURED loans to the tune of billions of naira, to friends, associates, and in certain cases, themselves.

All this happened in an economy where struggling business owners repeatedly have their bank loan applications turned down! Isn’t it just amazing?!

Yet, these same MDs before their exposure had been variously invited as guest speakers to "advise" the rest of us at different times on our finances – and even on the subject of "success".

If only we had known what they were doing behind closed doors, we would have been wiser. Some of us would probably not have lost so much money trading their "manipulated" stocks in the stock exchange for instance!

I can already hear those phony patriots screaming that I am bad mouthing Nigeria by writing all the above negatives about the country.

I respond by asking: what good has sweeping our bad habits under the carpet done us so far? What good has our unwillingness to bring unpleasant issues that retard our progress on the table for discussion brought us? Today, things are even WORSE than ever!

My patriotism requires me to QUESTION bad practices I notice, in a manner that influences CORRECTION to be effected.

I do NOT believe turning a blind eye to wrong doing will yield any positive long term benefits for anyone – EXCEPT of course the perpetrators.

Fela Anikulapo-Kuti, Gana Fawehimni (both now late) and Wole Soyinka are the PRACTICAL role models I can relate with. It is their example I will gladly follow.

Look at the Americans.

They do not even spare their presidents, when the need for corrective feedback is identified.

Ask Bill Clinton – who had to endure having the minutest details of his affairs x-rayed on TV, the web, radio and all other media for many months as his case with Monica Lewinsky progressed. Why can’t we copy America in this area – the way we ape them in their fashion, music etc?

You see, I believe we have other more useful lessons we can learn from the Americans, but we choose NOT to see them, because we are INSINCERE. That is also why we do not progress. American speakers, authors, radio/TV presenters etc can rightly tell their citizens in America to DARE TO DREAM.

This is because their society has in it, people (and systems) that will ALLOW those who are BEST qualified, those with proven competence, to WIN.

When we invite them to Nigeria, to speak to our people about achieving similar results, we must be prepared to CREATE an environment similar to that which the Americans have created for success to become a WAY OF LIFE.

Final Words: You owe yourself a duty to INVESTIGATE the credentials, and so called "achievements" of the numerous advisers that parade themselves today, in this society.

Take it from me, there are among us for instance, "success coaches" who speak and write about being able to weather hard times or adversity, but who will cave in, and compromise on all fronts, at the slightest sign that tough times are headed their way.

I have met them in large numbers out here.

And they are the ones usually most visible and available to offer advice to the rest of us in society.

Beware, therefore, who you take advice from – whether in your business or personal life!