Self-Devpt. Nuggets™

“If you don’t start attending Church we cannot work together“! Yes. A REAL client recently told me that  And it was not my first experience. It’s unfortunate that I have to say this. But since 2002, when I became self-employed, ONLY clients who claimed to be “Pentecostal Christians” have ever ever made my religion an issue in this manner.

NB: Everything I describe in this article, is with specific reference to my personal experiences in Nigeria/Benin Republic. Yours may be different.

And That’s Why I Feel Obligated to Write About This Problem

Of all the possible challenges that can arise in interpersonal relationships, I have found the one relating to religion, the most potentially destructive.

First of all, let me state here that I have met and enjoyed wonderful relationships with clients who profess Christianity (some Islam), and live exemplary lives. None of them ever made my religious disposition a condition, for relating with me on a business or personal level.

However, I have also come across phonies/zealots, who made a big issue of religion in their relationships.

No matter how hard you try to avoid it in your business conversations, they eventually have to ask you:

“So where do you worship?”

The minute you say you’re not a Christian, or you do not attend church, or you’re not born-again, your problems with them begin!

The typical zealot will consider it his/her duty to “convert” you at all costs.

Now, this should normally be an act of love i.e. to want to help another person get closer to God, the way THEY know how.

However, it must be with consent of that person: If after hearing you out, s/he chooses to stay where s/he is, you must respect his/her decision.

That’s where these zealots fail to get it:

If you, as the person they speak to, do NOT agree to convert, they may go as far as not hiring (or buying from) you.

And they may not even care if you are the most qualified to handle the project (or your products are th best)!

And if they’d already hired you, like in my case with the client mentioned above, they may proceed to threaten you with NOT awarding future jobs to you.

My Ability to Construct a Bridge, Fly a Plane, or Build Software, Has LITTLE to do with My Religion – and EVERYTHING to Do With My Proven Competence!

If these people had their way, they’d go checking to see if the pilot of the plane they are to fly in, is born-again or not.

In fact, make the mistake of putting them in ministerial positions, and they’ll probably announce that the most plane mishaps occur when an “unbeliever” is flying the plane!

By the way, the foregoing may not be far fetched…

Recent reports have it that (following the latest air disaster last week), Nigerian legislators plan a prayer session, to ward off future plane crashes. A shocking example of people blinded by religion, chasing shadows, and leaving the substance unattended!

People Who Give Conditions Based on Religion, Often Aim to Exploit

They frequently have ulterior motives. Typically, they would say “God will bless you” or “Do it for the lord” or “I’m your brother or sister”.

All in a bid to get your products/services at lower rates that will often be unprofitable to you. But they would NOT care how badly your business could get hurt – no matter how much you appeal to them.

That’s why they’ll work hard to “convert” you. So you’ll find it hard to say NO.

If you’re especially gifted in areas they have needs, expect this to happen.

My versatility makes me encounter this often…but I’ve learnt how to deal effectively with them.

What You Can (Indeed SHOULD) Do…Anytime a Client Gives Religion as a Condition

If you ever come across a client who says “If you don’t attend Church I won’t hire (or buy from) you”…or something similar, do NOT give in.

Unless you truly believe that to be the way for you…

I connect with my creator in a way that works for me. That’s why my response to such threats has therefore ALWAYS been the same:

“Do whatever you feel will best serve your interests, Mr/Ms/Mrs. (name).”

(NB: Like I’ve told many people, I depend 100% on my creator to open doors of business or personal advancement opportunities for me. So, nothing ANYONE says or does can stop me getting what is mine!)

Guess what?

In most cases, the same clients assign me additional projects – or even extend my mandates!

Sometimes the individual would later say to me:

“I assure you Mr. Tayo. You’re going to be a pastor one day”.

To which I would respond (with a big smile plastered across my face) with something like this:

“I guess only God himself will decide that. So far though, he’s not told me any such thing”.

And that’s what a true believer in God should do:

After “telling” the (supposed) unbeliever, leave the rest up to God. Don’t demand s/he join your religion (supposedly on behalf of God) as a condition for buying his/her products/services!