Self-Devpt. Nuggets™

Everybody’s doing IT won’t always make IT OK! Photo: These “rear views” of 2 trouser-sagging young chaps in a Cotonou cybercafé I worked in recently, made me spontaneously burst into loud laughter, surprising myself and others! When they turned towards me. I quickly straightened my face, and attacked my key board with dead seriousness :-))

But I was still laughing internally for a while after that!

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t go around making fun of people…

I mean it was not the first time I was seeing any of them – often engrossed in multiple Facebook chat sessions of all kinds (I leave you to use your imagination there).

However on this particular day, what seemed to be brownish/dirty coloured underwear sticking out from under their trousers cracked me up. I just could not help wondering “How could anyone think that THIS makes him look good in any way?!!

For me, this was the quickest way to attract ridicule – justified ridicule – to one’s self.

Having said that, the truth is our value systems have changed over the years. So, what was “cool” when my generation was growing up naturally is no longer so “cool” these days.

I’m just not so sure I can accept that keeping my trousers above and on top of my underwear should ever be “un-cool” at any stage of life, and no matter how much society evolves.

In fact, I refuse to accept it. At least not for myself or my kids. Or indeed for any person who wants ME to take him/her seriously.

And I don’t care if all the sponsoring companies in the world pay fees to celebrities who dress that way.

I don’t care if those trouser-sagging celebrities have more money than Richard Branson, Aliko Dangote and Robert Kiyosaki put together.

If they refuse to let their God given brains and inner knowing about what makes decent dressing guide them, then they are NOT worthy of my serious attention or consideration.

Plus, I will make sure my kids know why such people are NOT worthy of emulation – their popularity and fame notwithstanding.

Sometimes majority may win the vote – but their VOTE may be a wrong “choice”!

Anatole France, the shipping magnate once said:

“If fifty million people say a fooling thing, it is still a foolish thing” – Anatole France

I have a saying of my own that I conceived to communicate the same message…

 “Some people make the mistake of equating consensus with truth. That you, and others who think like you, agree among yourselves that a centipede is a millipede wearing a metal coat, will not make the centipede become a millipede.” – Tayo Solagbade

In other words, sometimes the “majority” may win a “vote” over an issue in contention, but THAT will not mean they are right, and that the “minority” are wrong.

This is why it is possible for a crooked and dishonest person to bribe his way to win an election in a society where check and balances are not in place.

Such a person then assumes the mantle of leadership based on the premise that majority voted him in.

But the majority that voted him in could have held misguided opinions.

Those with the right mindset and views could have been in the minority, and yet their vote would have enabled a more competent or qualified person – who did NOT choose to cheat – to win the vote.

The essence of the above analogy I’ve made is that is not always wise to use the number of people in agreement about how to dress, or how to act or how to think, as a means of determining what to do.

Sometimes, the majority may have been too blinded in their desire to conform, to do the right thing.

The onus may end up being on YOU or ME, to be the ones that will critically examine the issue under consideration. Then give a balanced and well informed view, unaffected by your knowledge of how many people already agree with a particular position.

Sadly, in today’s society, very few people are willing to play this role.

Even when deep inside of them they know that the majority are wrong – they still follow! They are afraid of being singled out for criticism, for being different.

And that’s why we have what has been called a “herd mentality” afflicting many people today.

You see it in the zombie like thinking and actions of people, when they find themselves in GROUPS e.g religious gatherings, associations, even workplaces.

It’s the reason why today’s youngsters sag their trousers: because most people do it.

It’s also the reason many African women detest their short hair, and wear straight human hair from Brazil. Plus, that’s why some black skinned women, and even some men, use bleaching creams to try changing their skin colour from black to white.

It’s because they see “many” people do it – and get admired for doing it!

This mental attitude make such people o easy to manipulate by powerful and cunning others…

It’s happening daily- at various levels in society.

The question is ARE YOU one of those being manipulated that way?

It’s not easy to find out: if you’re scared to speak YOUR MIND (and ACT accordingly) when you feel differentl about something YOUR “group” demands, YOU have THIS problem!

Now, if that is so, is that the best you can do with the wonderful talents and abilities the Creator has put in your brain?

Furthermore (if you have a child) do you realize that being that way makes it likely that your child will learn nothing better than to be that way too – from you?

And lastly, do you know that the Creator will hold you responsible for letting your child go astray in that manner?

I do hope you’ll take this article as a wake up call, and realize that you NEED to assert yourself more decisively as a conscious living being.

It’s the least the Creator expects of you.

And your child will benefit from your being that way, more than s/he could ever gain from learning to follow the crowd, like a mindless robot!

Go out and be a light for others to follow, to self-discovery!