Self-Devpt. Nuggets™

In fact, many people who achieve phenomenal levels of success, can be quite difficult to LIVE WITH or GET ALONG WITH – especially if/when you fail to meet the high standards they strive to maintain.

I believe this does not make them bad. They are just so ruthlessly focussed on achieving their goals that they feel compelled to dispense with niceties, if they feel it will aid “progress”.

Majority of us in the public never get close enough to see this side of them however. Those who have to live with, and work for hugely gifted and driven people like Jobs, are the ones that enjoy that “privilege”. In Steve Jobs Was A Jerk, You Shouldn’t Be , a reflection on this “dark side” of the late Steve Jobs, by David Coursey , this timeless TRUTH once again comes across as reality.

Because we humans do not like to speak ILL of the dead, it is understandable that news about them rarely dwells on their faults – especially when they achieved positive things that benefited the majority.

I recall reading articles in which Bill Gates was reported to erratically throw tantrums at employees in meetings when someone said something he did not like. A favourite expression he had was “That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard!”.

Here’s an excerpt from one of many reports of this “Bill Gate-ism” on websites results returned in Google:

“I have lots of experience talking to Bill Gates and do not break into tears when he yells, “That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard!” so the Microsoft PR team seated me next to the chairman.” – Steven Levy (http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/14.11/ipod.html . See http://tinyurl.com/bgatesfaves for more examples.)

Now, just how NICE is that? Not very. Goes without saying.

BUT, and this is a BIG but, that never stopped him from becoming the richest man on earth.

And guess what again: It only proves these guys are HUMAN. I mean, they have to have some flaws, in addition to their obvious GENIUS, otherwise they would become PERFECT – which we all know humans CANNOT BE.

Now, here’s the most important point I want to make with this: Historical evidence suggests that certain levels of success or greatness, especially one that requires working with others or using others to achieve one’s goals, actually requires some amount of RUTHLESSNESS.

Let me put it another way. We all know it is good to be NICE to everyone, and not say hurtful things to others. But has is ever occurred to you that sometimes, people seem to produce their best performances when they are subjectedto the mental equivalent of a “Trial By Fire”.

When people KNOW that you will not accept anything LESS than the standard you’ve set; especially when they KNOW you WILL make a big deal out of their falling short; they often tend to TRY JUST A LITTLE HARDER than they normally would.

Movies made based on true stories about the military careers of some notable personalities, offer useful examples. Think about what happens – in those movies – to recruits when they start their training in the military under the “mean faced” and “verbally abusive” drill sergeant.

The recruits who can’t TAKE it eventually quit. Those who can, stay on, ALL the while HATING the sergeant, until s/he succeeds in transforming them into well trained and toughened officers. Then on the passing out parade ground, they realise he was actually only doing it in their best interest! And they suddenly regard him with new found respect.

Nice guys MAY sometimes NOT be the best people to help others develop their full potentials. Like the saying goes “The blacksmith places the iron in the fire in order to refine it“.

Sometimes that blacksmith may be a Steve Jobs or Bill Gates. I’m not so sure these two guys would have built the kinds of companies they did, if they had tried to come across as average everyday NICE GUYS who did not like hurting ANYONE’s feelings.

I know it’s hard to accept, but this is a theory that history itself seems to validate. I guess the onus is therefore on anyone who wishes to develop his/her genius, to become highly successful like Jobs and Gates, to “curtail” any excesses in applying this insight.

Related Stuff

1. Trevor Gay says “Once you’ve had a handful of bad bosses you have the ammunition you need to be a good (or even great) boss. ”

http://simplicityitk.blogspot.com/2007/11/good-boss-bad-boss.html

2. In my article titled “Is It(Sometimes) Good To Have A Bad Boss?”, I summarise as follows:

“That difficult persons can challenge us to put in more effort and deliver better results than we normally would, if they were not present – making their presence/actions a blessing of sorts for us.”

http://www.spontaneousdevelopment.com/articles/ebno1/badboss.htm