Monthly Archives: March 2013

Self-Development

Would You Discriminate Unfairly Against Others, If Your Life Depended On It?

You can get a 7 minute audio version of this article: send email to audio at cbstudio dot biz  with “Would You Discriminate” in the subject line)

It’s a natural instinct we humans have. All societies have people who feel a need to separate themselves from others based on religion, race, ethnicity, educational achievement, social status, maybe sometimes personal accomplishments, wealth and so on.

We hear sometimes of a young girl from a rich home being forbidden to continue seeing a handsome but jobless boyfriend she claims to love. Then you have those people who subtly discriminate against people of other races they consider inferior. They refuse to relate with them as equals – and won’t even share the same table with them.

And then we have people who discriminate based on religion. For instance, I’ve heard some people claim if a person won’t accept their religion, s/he will not be worthy of being associated with them!

There are those who feel they must not associate with others who are not as well schooled as they are. So they tactfully establish what qualifications people they meet have, and use that to filter out those they feel might be sources of “potential embarrassment “ in their own social circles. God forbid they be found relating with unlettered persons or school dropouts!

That’s a shame really.

Why (& How) Discriminating Unfairly Can Hurt You

Now, I’m sure nothing that I’ve said here is new to you. And I’ve seen it happen again and again. I’ve actually found out that some people don’t even know they’re doing it. And others don’t even think it’s wrong.

Let me tell you why discriminating against others in this manner, can actually end up costing you (and even your loved ones) very painfully and expensively.

I’ll use a simple analogy. A perspective that gives us a powerful reminder that we are all the same, under all our clothing, outside the material resources we’ve acquired. We are all just flesh and blood – the same before our creator.

What I’m about to describe – the analogy I’m about to use, is something that is real, and can actually happen. There’s a real possibility it can happen. We have heard stories that are very similar to it.

Imagine you’re traveling on a ship with your daughter across the ocean to a holiday destination. Then you notice as you come on to the ship, a hefty looking but very badly dressed guy who has tattoos all over his arms and neck, and a ring in his nose. As you walk past him, you catch a whiff of  stale sweat oozing from him. He’s sitting alone in a corner, and apparently others have done what you did – just walked past quickly. You hear others whispering that the Captain let him on when he showed identification, explaining that he had been robbed, had no money and was trying to get back home.

As you stare at him, your 3 year old daughter innocently waves at him. He looks at you and says “You have a lovely daughter”. Without saying anything, you hurriedly look away, grab your daughter by the arm, and walk to the farthest end of the room. And as you seat your daughter down, you say sternly to her: “You stay away from that man, you hear!”

And the journey begins. Some hours into the trip, there’s some noise – some disturbance. And you hear some kind of uproar. And the captain announces:

“The ship has just been sabotaged and we’re sinking. We’ve also found out that the life boats have been damaged and everyone will have to swim to shore.”

Then he mentions that they’ll try and help those who are much weaker amongst the passengers. Of course they have limited hands to do that.

You cannot believe your ears. You feel the ship beginning to tilt as water rushes into the damaged underside. Other passengers are screaming, and you see some people already jumping into the sea and trying to make it to shore.

You look wildly around, call out to the ship’s personnel running past you. But none take notice. Suddenly, you notice the big, smelly tattooed guy, climbing up the side of the ship from inside the water. And as he gets into the ship, you hear the Captain thanking him for carrying an elderly passenger across to shore by swimming a distance of about a hundred meters.

He looks up at that point, and sees you and your daughter standing, looking helpess, and he walks over immediately, saying:

“Let me help you – I can carry your daughter across. We don’t have much time,. The ship is going under any moment now.”

What Would You Do At This Point?

Would you tell your daughter to “stay away from him” again? Or would you let him help you? In other words, would you feel “safe” discriminating against him under this situation where the life of

Entrepreneurship

Getting Other People to Give You Money for Your Business (Featuring: ONE Big Mistake That Can Make Even Loved Ones Say “NO”!)

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NB: This is the first of a ten part series based on an e-book I wrote few years back. Subsequent parts are published at weekly intervals – in the “Entrepreneurship” category.

This post is based on my personal achievements. Like I often say about my written works, this is real life experience – not textbook theory.  Without offering WIIFM (What’s In It For Me) answers, people will either NOT help or they’ll STOP helping you. This article explains how you to get others to willingly give you money/support for your business. It also highlights a major mistake that prevents many entrepreneurs from getting such help.

Having Adequate Capital from the Onset Can Hurt – Rather Than Help – You

First of all you must understand how to view your lack of money or capital. Know that it is not necessarily a bad thing. Indeed, quite often it can be a blessing in disguise – especially if you take advantage of it to improve your ability to get what you want.

A lack of money drives people to take personal action. The feeling of insecurity that arises from not having the means to purchase what you want can be a great motivator. In contrast, when a person finds he has virtually everything he needs at his disposal – especially money – his inner love of ease has a tendency to kick in.

Except he’s a rare type with focus and self-discipline, he’ll relax, and fail to push as hard as necessary to really make things work as they should.

Historical records of the lives of past successful entrepreneurs suggest this to be true. Indeed, many who grew their business into international reckoning openly admitted when interviewed that a lack of adequate capital got them that far. They literally had to “claw their way up to success”.

That experience taught them to find ways creative ways to get things done without spending money, and to be prudent in using what they had. This enabled them get more done with less, and they built giant corporations using those hard earned skills.

Many also said they believed if they had had enough money at the start, they would not have been forced to develop the skills that helped them growing their companies cost-efficiently the way they did.

Make It Easier To Get Help By Learning How to Make Money without Money

The above is why Dan Kennedy said in his book titled “How to succeed in business by breaking all the rules”, that he believes it helps to experience a lack of capital. In his opinion – which I happen to share based on my personal experiences/achievements – if you cannot make money without money, you cannot make money with money either.

Dan’s advice to people YOU plan to ask for money, is that if they want to back an entrepreneur, they should pick one who has shown that he can make things happen without adequate capital. Not one who insists he needs money before he can do anything!

TIP: Go out and get some experience under your belt, before you go asking for help.

You’ll need to do enough to demonstrate you have the passion to make your ideas work. Have evidence of some tangible results you’ve achieved with your own efforts. That way, when you speak with those you want money from, you’ll sound more genuine.

They will see that you have an emotional investment in your business. And it will make them believe you’ll do your best to make it work.

Getting Other People’s Cooperation: ONE Big Mistake to Avoid!

The story is told of a startup entrepreneur who struggled to find people willing to invest in a business idea he had, even though they had the money. Every person he approached simply did not show any significant interest.

For a long time he could not figure out why these people – most of who were friends and relatives – were not forthcoming despite the repeated attempts he made. It took him a while, but he eventually realized it was due to a mistake he was making.

Simply put, he was NOT addressing the issue of WIIFM, which means “What’s In It For Me?” Addressing this question will effectively help you identify what you need to do, to get other people’s cooperation in any endeavor you embark upon.

Basically, you have to think of the interest of the other person. Ask yourself:

“What do I give in return for the money I want him/her to invest or donate or lend to me?”

Depending on the exact nature of the proposal you have in mind for a particular person, you may also have to think up an answer for this question:

“How will the person giving his/her money get it back or out of the business?”

Derive realistic and practical answers to the above questions, giving due consideration to any relevant possibilities that may occur with each individual. Then go to each person and make your proposition, offering answers to those questions mentioned above.

I am of course assuming here that you will have every intention of acting with honor and integrity in approaching these persons. If that is the case, you’ll find that by persisting, one or more of those you approach will eventually say yes.

Build Mutually Beneficial Relationships With Others – Before You Ever Need Help!

It goes without saying that the answer you want may not come immediately or overnight. It could take time. And sometimes you may have to gain the trust and confidence of a person you want help from. Harvey Mackay wrote a book on this titled “Dig your well before you’re thirsty”.

In other words, before you ever have to ask others for help, make yourself useful to them (without being manipulative) in as many ways as possible. Forge relationships with people you believe can help you with your goals. Find ways to help them get what they want as often as the opportunity presents itself – and you’ll gain valuable friendships.

Over time, you’ll find that when you have a need it will be easier to approach this network of people to get help. Quite often, even those who cannot help will be willing to tell you where you can go. And they may even gladly give you recommendations, referrals or endorsements!

Public Speaking

How to Do the Impossible! (5 Tips You Can Use)

This is an ambitious topic. Question: What qualifies me to write on it? Answer: The fact that you’re reading THIS, right now – It’s proof of the fact that I successfully persist in doing what others have said is impossible – in spite of repeated orchestrated attempts by some to “pull me down”, over the past ten years. This is a simple statement of fact.

Many who seek to achieve authentic success, with integrity, face similar trials.

But rather than talk about haters, this issue of my Speaking IDEAS newsletter discusses how a competent expert, like YOU, can do what others say you cannot. e.g. establish a lucrative Speaking Business, and/or use Public Speaking for your business marketing.

Click now to view the latest issue of Tayo Solagbade's Public Speaking IDEAS page

View Tayos video tutorials and demonstrations on Facebook Productivity Tips, Web Marketing, and for his Custom MS Excel-VB driven software applicationsConnect with Tayo on LinkedIn.comConnect with Tayo on Facebook.comConnect with Tayo on Twitter.comConnect with Tayo on Google Plus

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Publication: Tayo Solagbade’s Weekly Public Speaking IDEAS Page (PSIP) Newsletter

Date: Monday 18th March 2013

No:81

Title: How to Do the Impossible! (5 Tips You Can Use)

Author & Publisher: Tayo K. Solagbade [234-803-302-1263]

Blog URL: http://www.spontaneousdevelopment.com/blog

Archive (For E-mail only version started 14th May 2012): Click here to view

Archive (For Blog version started 24th September 2011): Click here

Hi,

Please find below, the latest issue of my weekly Public Speaking Ideas page for 2013. 

SD Nuggets Blog™

 New posts from last week that may interest you!
Public Speaking[Monday]:

Entrepreneurship [Tuesday]:

Self Development [Wednesday]:

Career Development [Thursday]:

Parenting [Friday]:

Writing/Blogging [Saturday]:
Writing/Blogging [Saturday]:
Want me to write for you? Click here…

Coming Soon

(In Video, Audio, And Also As A PowerPoint Slide show Presentation!)

Click to view larger screenshot - How African Experts and CEOs Can Use Public Speaking To Win Buyers and Save Money!

I’ll be sending out links to the video narrated version of the above presentation in a few weeks. It’s an Educational Commercial designed to help experts (sales/marketing experts, business executives, entrepreneurs etc) understand the tremendous promotional benefits of public speaking.

It features a special message from Burt Dubin, a renowned mentor of some of the world’s highest paid speakers. There’ll also be a video message from Claude Moller, a highly sought after conference speaker and coach, based in South Africa, who enjoys national and international level success that proves the ideas advocated in this presentation work.

Get Notified When It Goes Live – Click HERE!

 

No. 81: How to Do the Impossible! (5 Tips You Can Use)

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NB: If you ever find yourself wondering what else I’ve written, some days after you’ve read THIS Speaking Ideas newsletter I send out on a Monday, here’s what you can do to find out: Point your browser to www.sdacademy.org to read at least ONE new post added to my SD Nuggets blog on a different category from Tuesday till Saturday (sometimes even Sundays) in line with this publishing schedule :-)

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This is an ambitious topic. Question: What qualifies me to write on it? Answer: The fact that you’re reading THIS, right now – It’s proof of the fact that I successfully persist in doing what others have said is impossible – in spite of repeated orchestrated attempts by some to “pull me down”, over the past ten years. This is a simple statement of fact.

Many who seek to achieve authentic success, with integrity, face similar trials.

But rather than talk about haters, this issue of my Speaking IDEAS newsletter discusses how a competent expert, like YOU, can do what others say you cannot. e.g. establish a lucrative Speaking Business, and/or use Public Speaking for your business marketing.

Many Experts Are Possessed By A Fear of Public Speaking

Many business owners and professionals dread public speaking. Those close to them often know it. That’s why the latter often express doubts or outright sarcasm when they announce their intention to launch speaking businesses.

James R. Cook, author of the Startup Entrepreneur, noted in his book that when people express doubts or scorn towards your idea, it is often a sign that you’re on the right path.

Now, we’re told to get the support of loved ones towards pursuing our goals. An assumption is implied that those loved one will “believe” we can succeed. But what if they don’t? Those close to us can be blinded by their knowledge of our shortcomings.

So rather than give us support, they’re may voice criticism, refuse to give material or other support, and/or even go against us.

For Those Doubted By Loved Ones, The Words Of Burt Dubin (creater of the Speaking Success System™) May Provide Some Consolation:

“Have noble intentions. A grand plan. A mission. An objective that makes a difference. A major difference. Something transcendent everyone you know assures you cannot be done, at least not by you. Many people who know you and love you do not believe you have what it takes to reveal the greatness they do not see through the prism of their misperceptions about you.” – Burt Dubin

People often measure what is possible based on what they have seen or experienced. To them, whatever they have never seen or experienced remains impossible.

Only a few who have developed their “senses” to tap into the depths of their intuition, to gain powerful insights into the nature of things, think and act different. The key to doing the impossible is therefore to become one of those few.

I offer 5 tips you can use:

1. Have Unquestioning Faith: The Fact That You Want To, Means You Can!

Yes. Another name for it is conviction. It’s the first step really. Donald Wattles in the Science of Getting Rich E-book explained that the very fact that you feel the “urge” to do something implies you have the capability within you to do it. This is a powerful truth. That’s why Napoleon Hill wrote that “Whatever your mind can conceive, it can achieve.”

Purge yourself of any doubts – continually, until you’ve trained your mind to only suggest the kinds of thoughts you want to you. You may have heard it said that “thoughts are things”. And if negative, they can attract the opposite of what you want to you. Do you have conviction that you can succeed as a speaker?

NB: Bear in mind – as Burt Dubin warns – that you must specialize in a topic that people are willing to pay for, if you expect to reap profitable financial rewards.

2. Develop Mastery – Learn Everything There Is To Know

Today, we fly across the world in metal planes that weight tones. Some decades ago human beings did not consider air travel to be a possibility. We send manned spaceships into space more or less at will. Yet, there was a time when those who dared speak of the foregoing as being possible were regarded as being insane.

I could go on. But you get the message. At every stage of man’s development, we have had to depend on those who refused to recognize impossibilities, to help us break “imaginary” barriers and take quantum leaps forward.

To achieve these man made miracles, those responsible toiled for years to develop knowledge and mastery of their subjects. And then they used that know-how to create new possibilities that we now enjoy today.

Do the same to achieve your speaking success

3. Take Diligent & Purposeful Action DAILY

You have to take definite action on a regular and consistent basis to achieve your goal. Wishful thinking won’t get you there. Verbal affirmations repeated all day will not.

A proverb in my language says:

“Eni ti o ba fe se nkan ti eni kan ko se ri. Oju re a ri nkan ti eni kan ko ri ri!”

Translated contextually, this means:

“He who wishes to do what no one has ever done before, will have experiences that no one has ever had, on the way to accomplishing that goal.”

I came across an infographic on Facebook, that expresses a similar sentiment to the above quote. It reads as follows: 

“If you want something you’ve never had…then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done.”

In essence, you cannot sit in your chair at home everyday, just dreaming of doing the impossible. You have to articulate a plan and put it in motion – with determination, and perseverance, making intelligent adjustments every single day, until you succeed.

What plan do you have for your speaking business? Click here to get help.

4. Know That It’s Unlikely To Happen Overnight (& Never Listen To Nay Sayers)

You may have to endure prolonged delays, painful setbacks and other bad experiences. These may also occur frequently. And that could shake your confidence greatly.

That’s why Burt Dubin says having bulldog blood is a crucial requirement for success in the speaking business. It will keep you going no matter what.

Burt’s article - Why You Need Bulldog Blood - to succeed as speaker.

When you’re starting out, some nay sayers may voice their doubts. If you seem not to be making progress (outwardly), don’t be surprised if people who previously “believed” suddenly become nay sayers too!

Sometimes they’ll pop up from closer to you than you every anticipated e.g. your spouse!

The truth is nobody, except you, can feel the way you feel about your goal. But if you do not give up, you’ll make believers out of those who doubt you. And when you succeed, they will be your most fervent advocates. So don’t let them shake your convictions!

Do you want to have bulldog blood? Email me via tayo at tksola.com to request an audio recording in which Burt Dubin tells a story that explains how to “get” it.

5. Draw Inspiration From Those Who Did “Impossible Things” In The Past

Like I pointed out in a comment I posted on Men with Pens, the unbelief of others cannot make an individual’s idea or concept unviable.

In making my point, I quoted Jeff Bezos (who started Amazon.com) as saying that every competent expert they consulted about starting Amazon.com told them not to. Not one saw the opportunity he – Bezos – saw at the time.

Wisely, rather than listen to them, he went ahead, and succeeded in a big way.

That’s just one of many examples of people who did what others thought was impossible.

Since you’re trying to do something that has never been done, chances are there won’t be historical records of past achievements you can consult to prepare yourself.

However we do have a wealth of information about people who succeeded in doing “impossible” things in the past. And Napoleon Hill’s “Think and Grow Rich”, based on his study of 80 millionaires, has proven that the principles of success are universal.

So, read their biographies.

How did they spend their waking hours? And the rest of each passing day? What kinds of friends did they keep? Where did they turn when they got stuck? What mental attitudes did they have towards failure, difficulty and other forms of adversity? And so on.

If you don’t already own it, get a copy of Napoleon Hill’s book.

If you do own it, but have not read it, there is no better time that THIS to begin.

It makes an excellent companion for people destined to do the impossible – like YOU!

Need More Details of How to Make The Above Ideas Work for YOU?

If you need more specific details of how to make use of the ideas I’ve shared in this newsletter, call me on 234-803-302-1263 or email tayo at tksola dot com.

Alternatively, send me a message using this request form (with “Re: How to do the impossible! ” in the subject line).

Click now

Have a lovely week!

Tayo K. Solagbade*

Self-Development/Performance Improvement Specialist

*Sole Agent For Burt Dubin’s Speaker Mentoring Service In Africa

Mobile: 234-803-302-1263

http://www.spontaneousdevelopment.com

Tayo Solagbade is a Performance Improvement Specialist & multipreneur. He works with individuals/businesses who want to achieve highly profitable outcomes, and also with parents who want to raise real-world competent children.

Tayo earns multiple streams of income providing clients with performance improvement training/coaching, custom MS Excel-VB solutions, web marketing systems, freelance writing services, and best practice extension support services (for farm business owners).

When he’s not amazing clients with his superhuman skills (wink), Tayo works as the creative force behind his Self-Development Nuggets™ blog, and Public Speaking IDEAS newsletter (which he publishes to promote Burt Dubin’s Public Speaking Mentoring service to experts working across the African continent).

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Have you been undecided about whether or not to become a paid speaker? Or have you been trying to get your speaking career off the ground with little success?

Here’s a tip: Burt Dubin works with people who want to be speakers, and with speakers who want to be masters. Click here to visit his website NOW and submit a contact form message telling him what challenges you’re facing, and how you’d like him to help you. Tell him I sent you, and you’ll get a pleasant surprise offer from him.

Comments?

What do you think of the above message? Do you have any personal experience to share on this subject? Are there some other points you feel can be added, to help persons looking for answers? Please share your thoughts!

Share this issue!

Do you know anyone who might benefit from reading this newsletter issue? Why not hit the forward button now, and send it to him/her with a short recommendation. You can also use share it via your social media channels. Thanks in advance.

View Tayos video tutorials and demonstrations on Facebook Productivity Tips, Web Marketing, and for his Custom MS Excel-VB driven software applicationsConnect with Tayo on LinkedIn.comConnect with Tayo on Facebook.comConnect with Tayo on Twitter.comConnect with Tayo on Google Plus

What fears or doubts are keeping you from (a) taking up Burt Dubin’s monthly speaker mentoring, or (b) buying his products?

You can choose to purchase Burt’s mentoring at any of the three (3) levels listed below:

1. Top Shelf [Click here] | 2. Mid Range [Click here] | 3. Budget Delight [Click here]

Burt’s three mentoring packages can be likened to the seating options offered by airlines: Budget Delight (Economy); Mid Range (Business); and Top Shelf (First Class).

At least that’s how I like to think of them!

All three will get you to your desired destination of “speaking success-ville” – so long as you meet the requirements/play your part well (your fare, abide by the set guidelines etc). During the “flight”, the seat you have will determine how much personal service attention and preference the provider will accord you. It’s that simple :-)

So, make your choice:1. Top Shelf [Click here] | 2. Mid Range [Click here] | 3. Budget Delight [Click here]

Send me an e-mail with your questions via tayo at tksola dot com. In the meantime, why not get started by subscribing here to get his 7-Part Course (How To Succeed And Get Paid As A Professional Speaker) .  . . and receive his monthly newsletter (Speaking Biz Strategies Letter) at no cost.

Get mentored by Burt Dubin - coach of some of the world's highest paid public speakersFor over 25 years, Burt Dubin has provided a variety of speaker mentoring products and services to clients worldwide.
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Writing/Blogging

My Recommended Posts for W/E 16th March 2013: Jan Vermeer – The Man Who Found a Way To Paint Light | Sunday Evening With Ghana Association of Writers (GAW) | Toyin Aluko’s Lagos State Handball Association distributes handball equipment to 15 schools

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These past two weeks I’ve spent a lot of time reading up and researching for a major project I’ve been dreaming about for years. None of that is meant for this medium however :-)

But I did read some interesting stuff that I can share…

1. Jan Vermeer – The Man Who Found a Way To Paint Light

The artist who found a way to do what other artists in his time, and up till this day, have not been able to do: He developed a technique called “pointillé”, for painting natural light.

Visit http://www.janvermeer.org/ to learn more about his paintings, life etc.

It was while listening to Burt Dubin in a SpeakerMatch radio show issue I transcribed that I first learnt about Jan Vermeer.

The theme for that SpeakerMatch show’s issue was “What They Don’t Teach You In Speaking Business School”.

To get the full PDF transcript I’ve created, with pictures and time stamps use the contact form or email me via tayo at tksola dot com.

NB: Vermeer’s technique sounds similar in name to (but is different from) pointillism, which is a technique developed by George Surat (if I recall correctly) and which involves using a series of tiny dots to create artworks. It so happens that I once promoted the creations of a Lagos based artist – Eze – who specializes in using Pointillism.

Apart from putting up a mini arts gallery/website (click to view it) on my web hosting space to showcase his pieces, I also built an online store with Cafepress.com (click to view it) offering over 50 different gift items branded with images from one of his works.

2. Sunday Evening With Ghana Association of Writers (GAW) – By Nana

I’m really excited to see the concerted efforts being made by Ghana Association of Writers to promote interest in reading and writing as a vocation among youths and adults alike.

Nana’s report on her “Sunday Evening With Ghana Association of Writers (GAW)” caught my interest when I stumbled on it. Click here to read it.

When I was done with the comments, I Google for more details about GAW and discovered that they have partnered with the nation’s Ministry of Education to re-launch the “GAW School Outreach Programme”(GWASOP) – to promote the twin habits of reading and writing among students nationwide
Click here to learn more about GWASOP.

The GAW impresses me because they are so active, and involved in infuencing positive developments in different. For instance, they also contribute to the Ghana International Book Fair.

It would be great to see more associations across Africa operate the same way.

3. Toyin Aluko’s Lagos State Handball Association distributes handball equipment to 15 schools

I played competitive handball

up to state level from the age of 12 (1982) till I left the university in ’92 (I captained the University’s team to the last NUGA prelims that held before I graduated).

After leaving the university, I tried to stay in touch with the game. While working as a manager in Guinness I periodically trained with the Edo State Handball team.

Since relocating to Lagos after becoming self employed, however, I’ve not been able to find players training at the stadium which I’ve visited with my kids. I’m especially keen to introduce the sport properly to them. The level of discipline and physical fitness required to play competitive handball is great – so much so that people in other sports are often in awe of the physical stamina handballers display.

Apart from priviledges like free university accommodation etc, playing handball helped me develop qualities that have proved useful to me in my studies and also as an entrepreneur e.g persistence, resilience, fighting spirit, mental stamina, determination, endurance etc.

I want my kids to get those benefits too. And that’s why I am so excited by what the Lagos State Handball Association’s Toyin Aluko who runs the association(she’s played the game at international level, and now holds a PhD in Sports Administration).

The association recently donated equipment and kits to 15 schools as part of a big plan to revive the sport in the state.

Writing/Blogging

Does Your Blog’s Income Earning Ability Depend On Comments Volume? (Additional Insights from 2 Famous Bloggers)

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In my Blog Comments Multi-Post Series (see table of contents at the end of this post) published last year, I basically said “No” to the above question. If you’re in a rush, I’ll save you the hassle of reading this to the end to find out what I now think: I still say “No”: There is no tangible correlation (negative or positive) between a blog’s income earning performance and the volume of comments it receives.

Over 10 months of closely studying successful blogs/bloggers in a wide variety of niches inform my view.  If anybody has verifiable data that proves otherwise, I’d love to see it. As a Performance Enhancement Specialist, I have a Best Practice focus on establishing reproducible success formulas for venturing into various areas of endeavour.

This 1,500 word post offers you the most recent insights I’ve gained – from studying two famous bloggers (Patrick Meninga and Chris Guillebeau) – to reinforce my opinion.

1. Patrick Meninga’s 5 Year $200,000 Blogging Success Story Podcast Interview: Not Once Was Commenting Mentioned!

When I recently spent time studying Patrick Meninga’s amazing story about how he sold his blog for $200,000, I realized I needed to revisit the subject again.

NB: I recently published excerpts from my new e-book which discusses 21 lessons I learned about blogging for passive income (fromYaro Starak’s podcast interview of Patrick Meninga).

But no one seems to have caught on to ONE big MISSING in Patrick’s story it appears. I find it intriguing that Patrick NEVR once mentioned “blog comments” during that entire 60 minute interview! This is quite odd – considering how many bloggers sometimes even insist that if your blog is not getting comments, you’re effectively spinning your wheels.

It Was An Epiphany Of Gigantic Proportions For Me!

Think about it for a moment. If you have not listened to that comprehensive interview, listen to it here. You’ll agree with me that Yaro literally “downloaded” everything (so to speak) from Patrick about his journey to achieving his amazing success story.

All through that entire session, a constantly repeating theme was for Patrick to “tell listeners what he did…how he did it…what worked and so on.

If Patrick received any blog comments that made him realize he was doing well or succeeding, he would have mentioned it. I’m sure you agree with me. If the site’s commenting community (assuming he had one) had grown as he added more articles, and so inspiring him to continue, I think Patrick would have mentioned that too.

Instead this guy told us he focused on working hard, publishing new content regularly to a daily quota, monitoring search engine results/rankings, and building keywords lists with which to author new content.

Not once did he mention asking people to post comments on the WordPress site all through that interview. Not even once! Yet, the website visits grew…and grew…and grew until he was earning enough to quit his job (over $1,000 per month!).

But that was just the beginning. Eventually, he had the owner of a real world treatment center offer to BUY the website off him for over ten times the normal price that most website owners would ever hope to get theirs sold for ($200,000!).

It doesn’t end there. Since that sale over 2 years ago, the new owner of that website has continued to pay Patrick to write new articles for the website. Wow – talk about getting to eat your cake and having it at the same time!

Again, think about it: that implies the guy has had no regrets about buying the site. Otherwise Patrick would be on the run right now…if you know what I mean :-)

All this came from a website that got more or less no comments worth mentioning.

Patrick achieved success with his website by loading content at a phenomenal rate (25 articles per day – and up to 400 articles per month!) into a website that was getting few or no comments from visitors.

Why Patrick’s Addiction Treatment Website Got Few Comments (My Take)

By way of interest, I spent some time thinking about it, and I came up with one likely reason why that website did not – and probably may never – receive any significant number of comments.

People interested in drug addiction rehabilitation or treatment are most likely to be those struggling with drug addition – or persons involved in caring for and helping such addicts recover.

Both groups are unlikely to be willing to broadcast their interest in such a website in publicly in a comments section

Update (25th March 2013):

This infographic published recently by Patrick (I got it via his e-mail broadcast 2 days ago) puts a dent in the theory I proposed above. It would appear the site did get many comments.

Whether contributors adopted aliases to feel “safe” in commenting is something that comes to my mind.

So does whether they were so worth mentioning to NOT be missed out in the interview…

In other words, I still find it quite striking (especially considering the impressive commenting activity the infographic reports he had), that not once did he mention comments in the extensive 60 minute analysis of his blog’s success. Not one time.

The way I see it, such a level commenting activity could also have pointed him in the direction of new topics to write on (or not) for instance. And that would have made an impression worthy of mention in the interview.

But then I guess sometimes things can skip a person’s mind…

Click here to take a look at the infographic, and draw your own conclusions to guide your blogging efforts :-)

2. Chris Guillebeau Says “Don’t Let Comments Kill You!”

Chris achieved Internet fame by building a large following rapidly in a short period of time using blogging and social media. He’s the kind of person who should know.

I discovered Chris through his (Art of Non-Conformity) world domination mission’s first manifesto. It was emailed to me by Burt Dubin – creator of the Speaking Success System and mentor of some of the world’s highest paid speakers (whose products and services I promote to experts across Africa).

I remain forever grateful to Burt for that thoughtful gesture.

If you have not read Chris Guillebeau’s website and many useful manifestos you’re missing an opportunity to change the way you look at life and achieve true fulfillment! Click here to visit his website – there’s a lot to read and learn.

If you end up with a site that attracts lots of comments, it may go from giving you pleasure into a nightmare of sorts. That’s probably what comments management became for some famous people who chose to close comments on their blogs.

One example I mentioned in my series on my comments is Steve Pavlina. I wasn’t surprised to find him mentioned by Chris in his second PDF manifesto as well. Seth Godin is another famous person he mentioned.

When Steve did what he did, it caused a major uproar. Some predicted the demise of his site. Long after that we all know nothing of the sort has happened. Steve had carefully done a cost benefit analysis before pulling the plug on commenting.

At the end of the day, as a productivity expert, he was able to define what really mattered most for him to succeed. And comments management simply did not fit in.

Chris Guillebeau rightly points out that you don’t have to be famous to be able to “safely” dispense with comments on your blog if you feel so inclined. He offers the example of his friend, Naomi – who did just that and lived to tell the tale :-)

So, it’s really up to you to decide.

This Is Not An Anti-Comments Post…Only a “Health Warning” :-)

Keep in mind here that I’m not against allowing comments on your blog. What I’m saying is that in your writing and blogging efforts, avoid falling into the trap of drawing validation for continuing your work from the number – and type (read: positive or negative) – of comments you get from your blog.

If you do, you set yourself up for a potential “crisis”.

What happens for instance, if people suddenly stop commenting – for whatever reason? Or what if the number of people who comment starts dwindling? Even worse, what if more people start posting negative comments? All of these are real possibilities.

Think about it. If you started your blog with the right mindset, you would know that YOU should be in the driving seat of your blog’s evolution.

YOU should be working to a plan you prepared by yourself – or in collaboration with trusted others. It goes without saying that you may have to modify it based on input from others where necessary.

But for the most part this would be YOUR vision in motion, so to say. And that’s why focusing too greatly on whether or not you get comments, or whether the comments are in line with your expectations can be emotionally stressful.

Here’s my suggestion: Save your physical, emotional and intellectual energy for the most important tasks. The main one being keeping up your content creation and marketing. That’s the key to your ultimate success.

Final Words: Don’t Kill Your Enjoyment of Blogging By Fretting Over Comments

Commenting is an activity that many bloggers – some are top rated experts – readily brandish as a powerful indication of the success of their blogs. And  many of their followers use this as a measure of the value they should place on any blog they visit. And for their niches, they are probably right.

The web is literally packed with thousands of how-to articles explaining what you need to do to succeed in this highly visible blogging activity. And yet I have not found one post or article offering reliable data showing a tangible correlation between nurturing an active commenting community on a blog, and the success – I mean financial –  it achieves.

And that’s not surprising – at least to me. The insights I have shared in this article indicate it’s not a one size fits all thing. You cannot make a blanket statement about the importance of comments in measuring the progress or success of a blog or website.

Quite often it will depend on the topic/theme of the site, the nature of activity it discusses, and the preference of those who frequent the site, among other factors.

It therefore follows that a comment-less blog can become financially successful. Examples abound on the web – for anyone willing to look objectively.

One such website (with blog) is this one, from which Burt Dubin earns thousands of dollars in passive income year-in, year-out by selling speaker mentoring products and services to buyers all over the world.

So, don’t kill your enjoyment of blogging, with an unhealthy obsession with getting and managing comments.

Remember: you can still succeed even if you do NOT get any!

================

Blog Comments Multi-Post Series – Table of Contents

Post 1: Should You Worry About Getting Blog Comments?
Post 2: Deciding If Your Blog Needs Comments To Succeed (5 Questions To Ask Yourself)
Post 3: Six Potentially Useful Measures of Your Blog’s Performance (Hint: Comments Vs. Five Others)
Post 4(Final): Using Your Blog To Make Money – Little Used Strategies You Can Exploit

================

GET A FREE COPY OF MY NEW FREE EBOOK!

To get your FREE copy of the FULL ebook  titled “21 Valuable Lessons I Learnt About Blogging for Passive Income, from  Yaro Starak’s 60 Minute Podcast Interview with Patrick Meninga”, (Includes my 20 page VERBATIM text transcript of Yaro Starak’s 29MB podcast – with time stamps.) – send email to me via tayo at cbstudio.biz with “FREE Transcipt PDF EBook” in the subject line.

Cover - 21 Valuable Lessons I Learnt About Blogging for Passive Income, from  Yaro Starak’s 60 Minute Podcast Interview with Patrick Meninga

Podcast interview transcript with headshots and time stamps.

Parenting

You Don’t Need a Monopoly of Wisdom (Smart Kids Know It!)

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We send our kids to school because we want them to get an education. Judging from our own experiences, a good education will – among other benefits – equip them with the ability to independently discern what is useful from the sea of solicited & unsolicited advice they will be exposed to as they grow up. This article explains how you can also help them understand that no human being is all knowing: so they can avoid getting misled in school, or in life!

Why A Good Foundation In Education Is Important

A teenage girl who has attended sex education classes is likely to be more alert to the potential dangers (e.g Sexually Transmitted Infections) and likely consequences (unwanted pregnancy) of engaging in unprotected pre marital sex.

That awareness will make her opt for protected sex, if at all she chooses to have pre marital sex. And if the means for having protected sex (e.g condom) is unavailable, she’ll know enough to say no, even when her partner pressures her or tries to sweet talk her into giving in.

Once a good educational foundation is laid for a child, she’s likely to actively pursue avenues to build on it to improve herself.

With diligence she will eventually arrive a level of intellectual competence close to, or possibly above that of her parents and/or other adults.

Some Parents Apparently Don’t Want That!

Some people who today are parents were sent to graduate school by parent(s) with little or no education.

When they graduated, they generally found their education conferred a unique advantage on them.

Among other benefits, they became thought leaders in their homes and societies, whose opinions were respected and contributions valued.

Now, ironically, there are some people who had educationally accomplished parents send them to school.

But they soon discovered that their academic accomplishments were not enough to make their parent(s) accept them as being intellectually competent!

One example. I once overheard a 70 year old retired consultant tell his 38 year old son (who is himself a practicing consulting professional) as follows:

“You can never know more than I do on any subject, because I came to this world before you!”

The son was understandably shocked to hear that, as was I.

And he replied:

“But Dad, why did you bother making me go through the hassle of getting a degree, if you knew you would not be willing to accept that I can actually be equally or more knowledgeable about issues, especially in my areas of interest or specialisation?”

The old man retorted “The fact that you’ve obtained a degree does not mean you can know more than me!”

The son shook his head sadly and threw up his hands in exasperation.

Demonstrate To Your Child That No One Needs a Monopoly of Wisdom!

I once read a quote that said “you can learn how not to be a bad boss by studying one”.

My experiences and observations from my 7 year sojourn in paid employment tell me that statement is true.

The above mentioned father and son exchange proved quite instructive for me. Indeed, It made a very great impact on me.

I learnt a powerful lesson from it, about how to succeed as a parent by refusing to claim a monopoly over knowledge or wisdom.
the ability to independently discern what is useful from the sea of advice they will be exposed to as they grow up.

And to ensure I do not fail, I’ve drummed it into my kids’ heads that no human being, least of all me, their father has a monopoly of wisdom on any subject.

To make such a claim amounts to being recklessly arrogant and irresponsible with one’s utterances. Even worse, impressionable children who witness such acts may be misled into thinking that is the right way to think and speak. And they could end up upsetting others they relate with.

I strongly believe one of the greatest gifts kids can be given, is the understanding that they do not need to prove perpetually that they are smart, by claiming to know more than everyone else.

We can help our kids develop this understanding by acting as responsible role models on a daily basis, and letting them know the value they will derive from emulating us.

Career Development

Frequent Secondments Can Cause Employee Ineptitude (A True Story + Tips You Can Use)

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If you’re an employer or an organizational decision maker, this article will interest you. It’s about how a talented employee’s development of on-the-job proficiency can be stifled by frequent redeployments – unless conscious efforts are made to prevent that problem from occurring.

This is a true story about an experience I had early in my career as a young manager in Guinness Nigeria Plc, Benin Brewery.

Completing My Induction Program

I was redeployed from the Lagos brewery in November 1995, (after an 18 month induction programme for me and 11 other Graduate Management Trainees ended) to the Production department in Guinness Benin and resumed work as a fresh faced green horned Shift Brewer.

During the 18 month induction period, those of us in the technical function were made to spend time learning the operations in the production, bottling, laboratory and other key departments in the function.

That experience – at least in theory – was expected to equip us to quickly settle into key roles in any department within the technical function.

Putting What I Learnt To Use

The above probably explains why few weeks after arriving at my new base, I found myself being given high profile assignments and sent on frequent cross-departmental assignments within Benin brewery.

And it was all very exciting for me, since it made the routine and repetitive tasks more bearable.

My most significant period of personal growth was therefore the time during which I had to quickly adapt to – and positively affect – different processes, work cultures and people without causing any disruption to normal running of such places.

In November 1995, I started off by spending 2 weeks in the brewery manager’s office carrying out technical projects.
Afterwards, I began the back and forth movements between packaging and production departments until March 1997 when I returned fully to my department to work as a Stout brewer.

At first I found shift duty to be excessively physically and mentally challenging, what with the numerous process problems presenting themselves – sometimes simultaneously – to the duty brewer.

Between 1995 and 1997, I continually struggled to develop myself to handle each process area I was deployed to.

At one time I worked as a brewer in the lager brewery converted for Malta production.

Then just as I was beginning to get used to managing that process, I was called in to temporarily fill the vacancy for a packaging shift manager following promotion of the incumbent. I was chosen, they explained, because they needed someone who could be brought in at short notice and and be able to fit in quickly.

My 1997 Performance Appraisal Does Not Go Too Well

Although the above mentioned movements allowed me to gain varied experiences, their frequency significantly reduced the depth of knowledge and experience I was able to develop.

This happened because I was never actually settled down long enough in one area to dig deep and become fully rounded.

This deficiency was pointed out to me during my 1997 appraisal session, by my boss, Greg. He told me he’d observed that I was not effective in managing situations, and the workforce under me, on my shift.

I did some honest soul searching and realized that I had unconsciously made a wrong assumption: that the additional work I did (most times along with my shift duties) in developing automated spreadsheet applications, and some ad-hoc project reports for my different departmental heads, would excuse my ineptitude at handling process-related problems on my shift.

So I went on to align my priorities with set, job related objectives so as to use my time and resources effectively.
Among other things, I began consciously working to overcome weaknesses in my performance identified during my appraisal.

Final Words

A measure of how well I succeeded in doing the above was apparent from the higher responsibilities and career advancement opportunities that later came my way.

Luckily for me, Greg’s ability to uncover the missing elements in my on-the-job competence, and his timely communication of same, alerted me to the need to take corrective action before the problem got too bad.

Decision makers in any organisation will find it useful to keep the above in mind.

It would help greatly, if they get their employees to watch out for such problems, and tackle them as quickly as possible.

Self-Development

When Your Work Speaks for Itself, Turn Up the Volume!

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This post’s title is not a play on words. It refers to the need for more business owners to use Self Promotion to boost their marketing efforts.

Henry J. Kaiser reportedly once said:

When your work speaks for itself, don’t interupt.”

I agree. And I also believe one should explore ways to make it speak as loudly as possible, for the target audience to “hear” it.

Every serious minded person in business should practise self promotion without inhibition. I offer insights you can use, by drawing from my personal experiences.

How To Make Your Work Speak For Itself

The products or services you deliver to buyers constitute your “work”. Everytime you do “it” the value it is perceived by others to provide determines whether or not your work speaks for itself.

To put it another way, when your work makes others give you good reviews, referrals, or endorsements, then it means it speaks for itself.

Note that this would happen spontaneously most times. People will typically offer such positive feedback without being asked, and could even go out of their way to endorse you and/or your products and services.

Getting people to respond as described above requires diligent investment of quality time and effort in creating a uniquely positive and satisfying experience for anyone you relate with.

Never take anything for granted. Strive everyday to make your “work” better than yesterday’s. Put all your heart and soul into delivering something that will blow your recipient’s mind away anytime she comes into contact with it. Burt Dubin calls it creating a “Wow!” experience.

I would say you should aim to get everyone who comes in contact with your “work” to say “Wow!”. That amounts to making your work speak for itself. And if you can make that happen often, your success would be inevitable..

That’s what people who achieve and maintain long term success do.

How To Turn Up The Volume, When Your Work Speaks

Once you’ve mastered the art of making your work speak for itself, you need to make sure everyone can hear it whenever it does.

I say this because depending on the kind of work you do, and how/where you do it, your work may speak but it could be inaudible because it’s whispering!

One example: As a writer you can be exceptionally gifted in producing top class write-ups to meet agreed deadlines. Those you work for are likely to appreciate this and give you rave reviews and even repeat business.

But if you do not own a website from which to showcase your amazing written works and testimonials, you effectively reduce the “voice” of your “speaking work” to a whisper.

As you know, people’s attention gets drawn where the loudest “noise” is coming from. In the 21st century, that place happens to be the Internet. This means you can cheaply, quickly and easily create your own place on it, where your work can be better “heard” as it “speaks”.

Doing so will make it easy to turn up the volume as the need arises. For instance each time you write a new book you could put up a free preview on your website so more people get to hear it loud and clear.

When you add testimonials and positive reviews given by others to the book and on the website, you’d be turning up the volume even more.

And you could also send out free samples or complimentary copies of your book to thought leaders in your niche.

If your work so impresses them that they say “Wow!” and go on to talk about you to their network of fans admirers, you would have further boosted the “speaking volume” – and more people would “hear”!

Over time, as you repeat this process, you’ll win greater recognition for your efforts, as well as the accompanying rewards.

Final Words: Use A Website(With a Blog) To Turn Up The Volume

Self Promotion involves telling others the good things you can do for them, to help them get what they want.

It’s a form of marketing. And every business needs that.

As long as it is done with enthusiasm and in a manner that does not offend fair and mature minded others, there’s nothing wrong with doing self promotion.

Some people try to be too modest or humble with respect to what they do. So they shy away from using this strategy. But that’s rarely a wise thing to do.

Burt Dubin, on a live radio program shared a quote attributed to the great Napoleon that reads as follows:

“Modesty is for people who have something to be modest about.” – Napoleon

You need to acknowledge your true capabilities so that you can be a blessing to others. Playing small will not help you do that. And your creator would not want you to diminish yourself out of fear or exaggerated humility.

If you want people to choose you over others who do what you do, you can either talk a lot or let your work do more of the talking for you.

The latter option is often a smarter and more effective strategy because it saves you a lot of time and effort, and stress!

Instead you are able to pour useful energy into your work so that it makes the best possible impact on all who come into contact with it.

And ultimately, their positive responses will become the material you use to further promote your work or to “turn up the volume” for more people to discover you

So go get your website, start writing articles on your subject using a blogging tool like WordPress on it. Aim for quality pieces that qualify to be called “epic” or “pillar” content, to turn up your work’s speaking volume.

NB: This applies to virtually any business type. There is hardly any product or service that will not benefit from having a website – that has a blog.

Write guest posts to make your “work” talk even louder from other people’s websites.

Keep doing the above diligently, no matter how slowly you may seem to be progressing.

Over time, you’ll be rewarded with attention from your target audience and the search engines.

And your work will not only be talking louder, but it will also make others start talking – excitedly – about you.

The above process was what led Patrick Meninga to become a famous blogger “overnight” (actually over a 5 year period) by earning $2,000 a month in adsense income from Spiritualriver.com, and then selling it for $200,000.

Read this post for 10 lessons you can learn about how to do what he did. (You’ll also get a Free PDF that contains a verbatim transcript I created of a podcast interview of Patrick journey to success that was done by Yaro Starak in 2012.)

Click to read the full post by Patrick about my verbatim PDF transcript of his podcast interview with Yaro

Entrepreneurship

Train Your Mind to Repel Fear

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Fear is a terrible thing. It negatively affects your state of mind, and at a point even your physical well being. It is my considered opinion, that the biggest mistake anyone can make is to allow fear to control her, or influence her decision making.

In fact I believe your ability to master your fears is a crucial requirement for achievement of success in any area of endeavour.

I’m not perfect. Nobody is. But we must all strive for perfection to make the most of ourselves. And one key step you can take towards achieving that end is to develop mastery of your fears.
You can experience fear in different forms. Maybe you fear making mistakes, or criticism, or embarassment. Fear has many faces.

In business the ability to manage your fears can determine how well you progress.

You may have a perfect business plan, adequate capitalisation, qualified personnel and so on. But if you and/or those you work with let your fears dominate your thinking, and reasoning, you’re likely to end up with big problems.

Below I explain 3 different ways fear can limit your ability to succeed in business.

1. Intelligent Risk-taking For Progress

There’s alway an element of risk taking in business. Things may not always work according to your plans. Quite often you’ll have to adapt them to suit the realities that you encounter.

If you’re fearful however, you’ll delay taking action in a timely manner. And that could affect your business progress negatively.

2. Negotiating Profitably With Clients/Customers

When business is good and you feel you have a lot of money in the bank, the thought of losing a potential client at the negotiation stage may not be so terrifying.

Afterall, you’ll tell yourself it’s not like you don’t have clients or money in the bank.

So most people tend to feel more comfortable in negotiating to get profitable prices or fees.

However, when business is tough and they feel they need money, the same people let the thought of losing the client or customer make them accept unprofitable fees or prices.

3. Managing Employees For Improved Productivity

Do you have super employees you know you can always depend on to produce needed results?

How do you treat them? Do you reward them well, or do you let the fear of offending other employees keep you from doing so?

On the other hand, do you have employees who give you problems that you are afraid to let go of because you don’t want to be called “wicked” or “bad”?

These 2 scenarios occur fairly often. Business owners who harbour fears of this kind ultimately delay taking needed action until the situation deteriorates.

In the former scenario, the poorly rewarded high performers get demoralized because they see others earn the same as they do, despite making minimal contributions.

In the latter, problematic employees become a disruptive influence in the workplace, and may even encourage other employees to emulate them.

In either case, the business suffers. All because the owner or decision maker lets unfounded fears keep him from acting assertively to reward employees in a way that sustains or even boosts morale.

Train Your Mind To Repel Fear

The human mind can be rather treacherous sometimes. It can make us forget who we are whenever tough times appear.

But you can train yourself to always remember, no matter the situation you find yourself, that you’re the same person, with the same ability to deliver results.

Burn that truth into your subconscious!

Doing so will eliminate fear in any form from your mind, so that it will not (or no longer) permit fear to influence its functioning.

And you’ll find that you can take risks intelligently, negotiate competently, and manage employees effectively, regardless of your personal circumstances.