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Publication: Tayo Solagbade’s Weekly Public Speaking IDEAS Page (PSIP) Newsletter Date: Monday 8th October 2012 No: 58 Title: Would You Speak The Truth? Author & Publisher: Tayo K. Solagbade [234-803-302-1263] Blog URL: http://www.spontaneousdevelopment.com/blog Archive (For E-mail only version started 14th May 2012): Click here to view Archive (For Blog version started 24th September 2011): Click here Hi, Please find below the latest issue of my weekly Public Speaking Ideas page for 2012. ===== No. 58: Would You Speak The Truth?
When I came across a discussion with the above theme, started by Al Bagocius in our LinkedIn speaker’s group some weeks ago (at http://lnkd.in/Pi85iP), my interest was instantly roused. He wrote: “Are you afraid of being criticized when posting your opinion on your LinkedIn profile or in group discussions? How much do you value free speech among your LinkedIn connections?“ Members of the LinkedIn group who responded to Al’s question were generally in agreement that it was important to speak one’s mind. They also felt that many people shy away from doing so, especially when it relates to networking interactions on a platform like linkedIn.com, to avoid losing business opportunities (e.g. by turning off potential clients). My interest in this subject stemmed from observing the above mentioned trend, which bothered me a lot. I had seen it lead to innocent people being left to suffer injustice, because “good” but fearful people chose to look the other way, rather than speak out. Therefore, in making my contribution to that LinkedIn discussion, I posted an excerpt from an article I wrote in 2006, to drive home my point (see screen below).
Drawing The Line: Political Correctness Vs. Freedom Of SpeechI could be wrong, but it appears there are more “fearful” people – including speakers – today, than there probably were a few decades back. And most of them let their fears keep them from voicing their honest opinions especially publicly. That’s not a good thing. But one does not have to look too far to understand what is responsible for this trend. Sociopolitical sensitivities in different societies across the world are at an all time high. In many countries today, you can get into big trouble as a public figure – and even as an ordinary citizen – for making what is considered a politically incorrect statement. To risk doing that, you need great conviction, and also access to accurate information and facts to back up your claim. Also be prepared to weather “attacks” from critics and others who will take offense. As a public speaker, the need to be alert to subtleties of societal interaction cannot be overemphasized. Take speaking to an audience comprising people from widely differing backgrounds for instance. You MUST tailor your message in a manner that ensures you do not offend any segment of your audience. Your use of examples and even humour must be balanced to convey your recognition of the different groups represented e.g. in terms of their sociopolitical, religious, and even sexual leanings. But having said the above, where do you draw the line between being politically correct and exercising your right to freedom of speech? Or your right to be true to yourself? Would You Voice Your HONEST Opinion, If Doing So Could Cost You?Sometimes your core values may require you to speak some truths that not everyone listening will like to hear. And it may not always be during a formal talk or presentation. Sometimes, it will be an informal gathering. One Example: Let’s say you’ve just addressed a group of young people (and their parents) – in a non-religious setting – on the subject of sex and abstinence. Imagine if during the question and answer session, a parent asks for your opinion on abortion – citing a tragic case of a young girl who accidentally got impregnated by a rapist. Her question: “Would you advise her to go ahead and have the baby whose father is a rapist? Or would you recommend that she have it removed as quickly as possible?” How would you answer THAT question? Would you speak based on your true feelings on the subject…which could be pro-abortion, if the victim was your kid or a loved one? Or would you choose to make what you consider a politically correct statement, based on how you think most of parents in the room feel about abortion? The above scenario typifies a point where your obligation to act in accordance with your true values, can present a formidable challenge. And this is just one of many possibilities. A Real-Life Example Of A Speaker Voicing His Opinion At The Risk Of Suffering A Serious LossA few years ago, Barack Obama was engaged in the presidential election debates towards winning his first term in office as US president. At the time, one subject I was keen to hear him take a stand on was abortion (given his pro-abortion antecedents as Senator). My interest arose from learning that he was an active member of a Christian church. And the fact that I knew abortion was generally frowned on by Christians in particular, and religious persons in general. So, I wanted to see how Obama would choose to stand on that sensitive subject – especially since he would be looking to garner voting support from the church community. “Will he let the fear of losing votes that could cost him the presidential election make him change his stand on abortion”, I wondered? My concern was not out of place. Even observers from my part of the world (where religious beliefs forbid abortion) who learnt of Obama’s stand on abortion readily faulted him on that count. The argued that if he claimed to believe in God, there was no way he could condone abortion under any guise. But I (and others who were willing to be objective) saw where Obama was coming from. He believed that certain unique situations required giving a woman the right to choose whether or not to have a baby. By the end of the debates, it was obvious that Obama was a man who was clear about his values. He knew he believed in God. But he also wanted to use his God-given ability to apply discretion, in evaluating the real life implications faced by those saddled with the burden of unwanted pregnancies in various ways. So, he made it clear he supported reproductive freedom under specific circumstances. This is now captured in the statement reproduced below from the abortion act(see below): ********************** “Abortion will not be covered in the Pre-existing Condition Insurance Plan except in the cases of rape or incest, or where the life of the woman would be endangered.” – President Obama’s statement on the H.R. 3 No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act on 14 July 2010. Source: http://2012.presidential-candidates.org/Obama/Abortion.php *********************** As you can imagine, Obama’s position on abortion was not popular countrywide. However, he made it firmly clear where he stood, and worked harder on his campaign. In the end, he won the elections without letting a fear of possible defeat prevent him from being true to himself. Notable Change Agents & Thought Leaders Are Known For ALWAYS Speaking Their Minds!People who don’t like to rock the boat or stand out/be different, can never be notable change agents or influential thought leaders! And speakers who make memorable impacts on audiences tend to be those who make profound declarations based on their deepest feelings and passions – even when it may offend some individuals or groups. Yes, it is generally wise to speak in a manner that ensures you do not offend others. But how much should you let such considerations determine what you say as a speaker – when hard truths need to be told? For instance, there are times when being a speaker makes others look to you for direction with respect to an issue. If you succumb to the fears you have, you may fail to voice essential truths – and lose the important benefit of impacting those who follow you. For instance, if asked by a journalist, what would be YOUR opinion on your country’s handling of corrupt public officers or citizens? Would you sit on the fence, because powerful people would be offended, or would you speak with conviction about what you believe is the right way to handle people found guilty corruption? Remember – some people look up to you (including your kids). They believe in your sense of judgment. When you fail to make a stand, you let them down. And you also make them prone to being manipulated by others they may turn to for guidance! You have a God-given role to play as an expert-who-speaks in your society: On a formal level as a professional, and a non-formal level as a respected, upstanding member of society. Do not fail to play it well. Summary: WALK YOUR TALK!On a final note, remember that you must also speak with integrity. Let it be known – and obvious to all who care to check – that you walk your talk. That you practice what you preach. And that your hands are clean! One speaker who continues to inspire me by the way he leads by example in the manner described above, is (Pastor) Tunde Bakare. I’ll mention two well known and verifiable instances: 1. During the January 2012 Anti-Fuel Subsidy Protests at Ojota (which I actively participated in), apart from leading the protests, he made sure his own family members were physically present at every rally. A journalist asked him why. He replied that he would have no moral right to ask thousands of other people’s children to risk coming out, if he kept his family safely tucked away. A message many “leaders” should learn! 2. Just yesterday, I listened to him on TV delivering an excellent message titled “The Hidden Cost Of The Easy Way“. And one of the highlights of that message was the need for parents to avoid playing favorites amongst their offspring. Apart from having a divided home, doing so could ignite deadly sibling rivalry. Bakare added that he never played favorites with his kids – and that ALL five had been taught to stand by one another, and never let outsiders turn them against themselves. A lesson many parents badly need to imbibe! In both instances described above, Tunde Bakare boldly spoke his mind without letting the fear of ruffling people’s feathers bother him significantly. But he also backed up what he said by walking his talk. Since I’ve used a pastor to illustrate my final points, I might as well end on a “religious” note, by saying: Go thou and do likewise Comments?What do you think of the above message? Do you have any personal experience to share on this subject? Are there some other points you feel can be added, to help persons looking for answers? Please share your thoughts – click here to post a comment on the blog! Share this issue!Do you know anyone who might benefit from reading this newsletter issue? Why not hit the forward button now, and send it to him/her with a short recommendation. You can also use share it via your social media channels. Thanks in advance.
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Have a lovely week!
Tayo K. Solagbade* Self-Development/Performance Improvement Specialist *Sole Agent For Burt Dubin’s Speaker Mentoring Service In Africa Mobile: 234-803-302-1263
http://www.spontaneousdevelopment.com Platinum Quality Author at the Ezine Articles Directory: http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Tayo_Solagbade Self-Development/Performance Enhancement Specialist – Tayo Solagbade– works as a Multipreneur, helping individuals/businesses develop and implement strategies to achieve their goals, faster and more profitably. Visit Tayo’s Self-Development Nuggets™ blog to find out how you can get your FREE copy of his new Practical Guide to Important Feed Ingredients (with high resolution pictures, prices, nutrients, uses etc). When he’s not amazing clients with his superhuman skills (wink), Tayo works as the creative force behind his Cost-Saving Farm Business Ideas website, and the Public Speaking IDEAS newsletter (which he publishes to promote Burt Dubin’s Public Speaking Mentoring service to experts working across the African continent). Depending on his availability, Tayo accepts invitations to deliver customisable talks and keynote speeches on topics relating to his areas of experience based expertise and interest. Visit http://www.tksola.com to learn how you can invite Tayo, to speak at your next meeting/event.
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