If you don’t feel fear, you’re either a cyborg or a ghost It’s normal to feel fear. But not all fears deserve our recognition. Interestingly, surveys reveal that more than a fear of wild animals, the fear of speaking before an audience tops the list for many people.

This article narrates a young lady’s near fatal encounter with a spitting cobra in a Nigerian village. It then highlights insights from that experience, for dealing successfully with unfounded fears, so you can achieve your goals, and live a more fulfilled life!

1. Living With Spitting Cobras in a Village without Electricity (A True Story)

There are times when it is wise to feel fear. A good example is when you come across a poisonous snake or any wild animal. However, you’ll often fare better if you use that fear to carefully navigate away from danger, rather than allowing it to strike terror in your mind. The latter could cause you to panic, resulting in avoidable injury or worse.

The following true story provides a useful illustration.

In 1993, I spent about 9 months serving with 4 other youth corp. members, in Gulu-Vatsa village, in Lapai local government area of Nigeria’s middle belt situated Niger state.

Like the villagers, we periodically came across black spitting cobras of different ages and sizes, along footpaths. Whenever that happened we followed the tips we’d been given: keep calm, standstill, and let the reptile slitter away into the grass.

Sudden movements could startle them. And when they get upset, they can spit venom with amazing accuracy. Documentaries about them often make a note of this.

One night, an unmarried female teacher who’d been away for a few weeks to see her family in the East, returned home. Getting in, she made her way to the toilet holding a torchlight (the village was not connected to the national grid, so we had no electricity).

On opening the door, her light fell on an adult cobra coiled up on the water closet!

She panicked and screamed, dropping the metal torchlight to the floor. The nervous snake reacted by spitting in her direction – and (as I was told) it got into one of her eyes. Luckily, she was rushed to the clinic and got the antidote injection on time.

We later learnt she left her window open when she travelled. The snake had adopted the warm interior to escape the cold. That incident helped us understand why we’d always been warned to avoid leaving windows and doors open, whenever we left our rooms.

2. Fear Comes From a Lack of Familiarity (E.g. Your First Day at Work, or Your First Day of Driving Alone)

We all experience a little fear. What’s important is to ensure it does not hold us back from making useful progress in life.

Can you recall your first few days on your first ever job? Or the first few weeks you drove alone, after completing your driving lesson for instance? Most of us nursed silent fears during those phases in our lives.

A quick confession here: I never took lessons. I learnt to drive a car (or more correctly, “move it in the direction I wanted to go!”) by watching the feet and hands of Guinness drivers – when I worked as a young shift brewer. I memorized the sequence of clutch and gear changes, and then tried out what I learnt on my father’s car when I visited home (behind his back, of course!).

Later, during the first few weeks of driving my own newly acquired (imported second hand) Toyota Carina, I was constantly gripped by a fear of causing an accident. This fear grew into near terror whenever I sighted a car (or worse a truck or trailer) coming up behind me.

I doubt I’m the only one who felt this way. But by driving regularly – sometimes making mistakes and surviving them – we gained familiarity with the activity. Today, we fearlessly go through the motions of driving cars, having literally mastered the process.

The above proves that we lose fear, and gain confidence, from knowing we can do something.

3. The Key to Defeating Fear: Get Familiar with Whatever Scares You.

In certain societies, people live in harmony with snakes, and even worship them. In others, the mere sight of a baby snake will have everyone taking to their heels. Kids in Gulu-Vatsa village did not consider Cobras a big deal.

It all boils down to familiarity.

To free yourself from the burden of your fears, learn more about the cause(s). Then as appropriate, do more of (or expose yourself more often to) it. As noted above, new drivers lose their fears as they drive more often. Same applies to public speaking, and indeed any other activity.

Just go out and do it, then do more of it (e.g. read books, then give free talks), until your fears fade into insignificance.

People who engage in dangerous sports and stunts have perfected this art. They feel fear, but they’ve learnt to keep it under control, so as to achieve their valued goals.

The examples discussed in this article have been provided for purposes of illustration, and may not necessarily apply to your situation.

However, the basic principles highlighted are universally applicable.

Decide whether or not the costs you currently endure as a result of your fear(s), are worth working to eliminate. If your answer is yes, then the ideas offered in this may provide a useful starting point.

Here’s wishing you a life free from the influence of unfounded and unnecessary fears.