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NB: This newsletter is published every Monday. Point your browser to www.tayosolagbade.com/sdnuggets to read at least ONE new post added to my SD Nuggets blog on a different category from Tuesday till Saturday (sometimes even Sundays)
in line with this publishing schedule
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1 of 2: PUBLIC SPEAKING – Dealing With Adversity Requires The Right Mental Attitude [Hint: Crappy TV Content Damages Character]
This week I discuss another of my pet peeves, in form of crappy Television content that teaches viewers to be weak/fickle-minded.
It is my considered opinion that most of us get served today, by what I consider an increasingly reckless army of TV content merchants, who allow their decision making to be driven so keenly by monetary profits as to be made at the expense of quality.
This is not some attempt to preach at anyone.
In fact, considering the fact that I am not a religious person, and have not been for over 3 decades, the last thing I qualify to do is to “preach” about anything.
However, I AM a parent, as well as an expert-who-speaks, with a vision and passion to influence others (in my personal/work life) to make the most of themselves.
This is why I am always sensitive to the nature and content of audio visual stimulation I, and my target audience get exposed to at any point in time.
In the course of doing my work over the years, i have learnt that the information I expose myself to, be it in visual or audio form, can have a lasting impact on me psychologically and emotionally, depending on how long the period of exposure ts.
I’m sure that most conscious adults understand what I mean here. We’ve all experienced what it feels like to be exposed to various forms of visual and auditory stimulation by way of movies and music respectively, for instance.
That’s when we see self-employed professionals who never seem to be able to get client work done on time, or to the required standards, because they do NOT know how to control their craving for TV soap operas.
So they watch longer than they should, failing to devote enough time to get client projects done to the agreed deadline. This leads to strained relationships, client attrition etc.
But that is not so bad. With diligent effort, anyone can overcome such mild addiction.
What I’m writing about in this issue, regarding TV content is something that’s much more harmful…
It’s actually causing lingering psychological damage to viewers, to the extent that they adopt warped mental attitudes that limit their ability to excel when faced with adversity.
Today, I see some foreign soap operas and local movies which depict characters with WEAK personalities.
I refer specifically to those in which the story lines involve one or more characters shown to be passing through prolonged hardship or adversity of some sort, but who rarely emerge from it by demonstrating strength of character.
Don’t get me wrong here…
I agree that not everyone will have the mental toughness to deal with delays, disappointments, setbacks or outright disasters happening repeatedly to them.
However, the reality is that WINNING in ANY area of endeavor requires that WE LEARN TO BE TOUGH.
As the well known saying goes, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going“.
Anyone who wants to win in life must be prepared to do this.
That’s where my opinion about TV content quality becomes relevant:
Stories about how some disadvantaged person defied adversity and antagonists to succeed, have long inspired others to face hardships in their lives with more determination, till they achieved their breakthrough.
When such stories have been told via the TV medium, they have often been most impactful, due to the visual imagery delivered by TV.
This happens because the human brain responds best to visual stimulation. What we SEE tends to make the greatest impression on us, and lingers longest in our memories.
I have personally benefittted from being exposed to such inspiring stories via TV, and they gave me courage to NOT quit, during the darkest hours of my struggles.
I stayed mentally strong, and kept thinking and working hard till I achieved my goal.
Today, the knowledge of where I’ve been and what I did to get here further inspire me to do more – and to share my own stories with my kids, so they can learn like I did.
The problem I have with most of today’s TV content is that they lack quality and depth required to deliver the above mentioned useful benefits to viewers.
For instance, over the last weekend, I found myself reading the riot act to my kids about their habit of watching certain soap operas and local movies I frowned upon.
The programs typically had storylines in which some person(s) went through prolonged periods of hardship and suffering caused by some mean individual(s) who despised them.
What irked me most was that very rarely did the story lines involve the “victims” ever taking action to fight back or find a solution to their problems by themselves.
Instead they were always shown crying and lamenting about how life was so unfair to them. Some would cry “why do I have to suffer like this?” and others would wail “Oh, if only XYZ had not died. How long are we going to continue suffering this way?”
To make matters worse, especially in the local movies, very rarely did a resolution of the victim’s problems come through some intelligent creative effort on his/her, or any other character’s part.
Instead, some religious angle was often introduced e.g. a religious leader comes in to do some prayers and all of the victim’s problems and enemies suddenly magically disappear!
Viewers end up seeing lightning strike evil doers or the bad person simply “run mad” – while the victims “rejoice” and the movie ends!!
Just what kind of mental attitude does this encourage those who dutifully watch movies of this kind to have, in thinking about challenges they encounter in life???
I ask this question especially with kids in mind.
Apart from the few opportunities they will have for experiencing the real world in their formative years, quite often what they watch on TV is the only alternative avenue for learning about life’s ups and downs, that kids have.
If all they keep seeing happen is that people facing difficulties in life habitually sit down moaning and groaning till some magical powers/prayers make their problems go away, what is there to stop them from believing it’s the right way to go through life?
I believe the above situation explains why we have a majority in many societies today, especially in my part of the world, who do not believe they need to exert themselves much to get what they want.
What they see on TV happening to others, who get rewarded despite not having exerted themselves to a major degree, to get what they want, teaches them to be that way.
As a parent, you have a duty to encourage your kids to SEE beyond that lie told in such TV programmes, so they learn as early as possible in life to challenge themselves, to achieve the goals they want in life.
TV actors are also experts-who-speak. Yes they are.
For me, all those who have to speak in formal settings to individuals or groups in any social setting, are experts-who-speak.
This is why I routinely challenge any that I interact with, to act in a manner consistent with what public speaking professionals are known for.
Not only is doing this beneficial to the expert, but it also ensures that those s/he relates with ultimately reap the most positive experience possible in interaction with him/her.
I know actors and producers do what they do to earn a living. However, they need to pay more attention to the potentially negative impact their content may have on their viewers.
After all, it is the same TV medium, especially via dramas and movies that positive social reinforcement messages are passed.
Examples include movies about history of slavery, the dangers of HIV, the need to avoid discriminating against persons living with HIV, and so on.
Such TV programmes are deliberately produced to communicate desired positive ideals to viewers, even as they often offer entertainment at the same time.
Producers of main stream TV content can take a cue from the above examples to strike a more responsible balance in delivering their content to viewers.
Let me end this piece with the quote in the graphic below, from Burt Dubin, about using what he calls “Bulldog blood” to overcome adversity, and achieve your goal:
Related article:
1. Why Have Bulldog Blood – by Burt Dubin
2. Your Future: Vision or Daydream – by Burt Dubin
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This newsletter (which I use to promote Burt Dubin’s Speaker Mentoring Products/Services) serves
experts-who-speak. Starting – Monday 13th April 2015 – it MORPHED in name and content served, to a 2 part Speaking/Web Marketing IDEAS newsletter, to better serve them.
You just read the “Public Speaking IDEAS” part above. What follows below is the “Web Marketing IDEAS” part.
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Burt Dubin works with people who want to be speakers, and with speakers who want to be masters. Click here to visit his website NOW and submit a contact form message telling him what challenges you’re facing, and how
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Burt Dubin’s monthly Speaking Biz Strategies Letter
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2 of 2: WEB MARKETING: To Achieve Sustainable Success, Closely Monitor News About Current Affairs and
Politics! [FREE MP3 DOWNLOAD]
“If you want to achieve sustainable success in business (especially in a volatile market place like Nigeria), it’s in your best interest to develop interest in
current affairs and politics, because those are the two key ingredients that really keep this country from having a stable sociopolitical climate.
And for as long as that stable sociopolitical climate does not exist, every person running a business will probably have to sleep with one eye open.” – Tayo K.
Solagbade
It’s FREE for all my Web Marketing/farm business clients, and ALL members of my Inner Circle as well as for ALL subscribers to THIS newsletter.
If you are not yet ANY of the above, just send me a message here to let me know.
If you want me to send you the full MP3 recording, just say so in your message.
NB: If you’re already a client or subscriber, email me via tayo at tksola dot com and let me know you want it
Alternatively, click here to request the FREE MP3 DOWNLOAD.
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Question: But who is Burt Dubin, and why do I (Tayo K. Solagbade) think you should you learn from
him?
Answer: Burt is a 3 decade veteran in the professional speaking business. After achieving top level cross continental success as an
expert-speaker, he has established a reputation for mentoring some of the highest paid speakers in the world. He owns SpeakingBizSuccess.com, SpeakingSuccess.com and BurtDubin.com.
Burt helps those he mentors (experts-who-speak) to Position, Package, Promote, and Present* themselves successfully to clients (*He calls
them the 4Ps). That’s why it’s no surprise that on Burt’s website, considerable space capital is devoted to useful business marketing articles as well as products.
It might also interest you to know that MANY years back, Burt established himself as one of the best marketing minds in the world. To really put this FACT in
proper perspective, I’ll provide more specific details in form of an example.
A few years ago, Burt contributed an article to a powerful publication titled “The Most Effective Articles Ever – By The World’s Top Marketers“. That 574 page ebook features timeless marketing advice from 71 of the world’s top marketers – including Jack
Trout, Joe Vitale, Yanik Silver…and Burt Dubin.
That’s ample proof that (in addition to Public Speaking), Burt would be a great resource to learn business marketing from!
Full Disclosure: I represent Burt as Sole Agent for his products/services, which means if YOU buy from him, I get paid.
But that’s NOT the main reason I represent and recommend him. I have benefited in many ways by learning from Burt. Through his writing, his audio recordings,
and from directly relating with him.
Before we teamed up in 2011, I’d been studying his work and adapting it to succeed in my work from way back in 2002. It does not matter what part of the world
you’re in. If you know how to adapt them to suit your peculiar local needs, Burt’s ideas and strategies WILL work for you. I am living proof of it!
That’s why I never tire of CONFIDENTLY recommending him to others.
If you need help putting the ideas shared above to use, let me know HERE.
in.
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Learn about Burt Dubin’s speaker mentoring products (books, audios etc) below…
If you need help purchasing ANY of Burt’s products (like “Presentation
Magic”), call me on +229-66-122-136 (in Benin Republic, my base) or +234-803-302-1263 (in Nigeria) or email tayo@tksola.com
Have a great week :-))
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