Tag Archives: knowing that I could not recognize or locate her. Read this article to find out what happened!

Socio-Economic Stability Makes People Less Inclined to be Dishonest [True Story: Lady hawker in Cotonou offers to send me (via e-top up) N250 Naira worth of MTN Benin airtime, and I agreed – giving her the money, knowing that I could not recognize or locate her. Read this article to find out what happened!]

Conversation between Me (Tayo Solagbade) & Lady Hawker in Cotonou – shown in the photo below (Translated from French to English):

This hawker – a total stranger – offered to pay for/send me (via e-top up) N250 Naira worth of MTN Benin airtime, and I agreed – giving her the money, knowing that I could not recognize or locate her. Read on to find out what happened!

Date: Sunday 10th April 2016 | Time: 9.46a.m | Location: Stade de L’amitie, Cotonou – Benin Republic

Conversation between Me (Tayo Solagbade) & Lady Hawker in Cotonou - shown in the photo below (Translated from French to English): This hawker - a total stranger - offered to pay for/send me (via e-top up) N250 Naira worth of MTN Benin airtime, and I agreed - giving her the money, knowing that I could not recognize or locate her. Read on to find out what happened!

Me: Good morning madam. Could you please tell me where I can buy some MTN airtime for my mobile line?

Lady: Ehm, I don’t think there’s anyone inside the stadium selling. But you’ll find them just outside the gate.

Me: Argh. But I’ve only just come in all the way from the gate to watch the Handball players training here. I’m not ready to go back out yet. Anyway, thanks for your help.

Lady (walks away, then suddenly turns around and walk back to me): Let me get it for you. Write down your phone number on a piece of paper, so I can get one of them to sell the airtime via “TRANSFER to your line.

Me: Thanks. But I don’t have a pen on me.

Lady Hawker: Maybe you can ask the security guard at the entrance to the FM/TV building over there (pointing to the office complex about 20 metres away from the courts.

Me: Ok (Soon I return and hand her my MTN Benin Republic mobile phone number)

Lady Hawker: How much airtime do you want to buy – and what network?

Me: MTN 500 FCFA (equivalent to about N230 – by the currently CRAZY Naira exchange rate)

NB: I give her a 1000 FCFA note, and she gives me 500 FCFA change. Then I thank her and she starts walking away…

Up until the above stated moment, I’d felt quite at ease with all we’d been doing. It was something that I’d done and seen done countless times since 2013, when I first began living in this country.

But a few seconds after she’d gone ahead, the Nigerian in me (i.e. that survival instinct from growing up and raising my own kids in a contrasting society where VERY little is done based on trust) took me over.

I thought to myself:

Tayo, just how gullible can you be on a Sunday morning? Especially considering you just came in from Lagos, last night? You’re really beginning to lose your touch! You don’t even know what this lady looks like for heaven’s sake! What if she does NOT buy/send the airtime as promised? How would you track her down?”

It was in that instant, on reflex, that I took out my smart phone and took the photo shown above.

But just as I took the photo of her walking away, I immediately felt stupid for 3 reasons:

1. The photo did not capture her face – only her back. That would be of little help in locating or identifying her.

2. The amount of money in question was really nothing – no big deal (a mere N250 – less than $1 USD): I’d lost or given away many multiples of that in the past!

3. My experiences from 3 years of living in Benin strongly indicated there were only about 5 chances in 100 that the lady – or indeed any other person who made me such an offer in Benin – would do such a dishonest thing.

You see, I’ve lived *and/or interacted) with people belonging to various income groups and social status in Benin. What I’ve discovered is that most of them have what Muhammad Ali told Zairean citizens he met, that they should NEVER lose i.e a “dignity in their poverty”.

Whether or not the Zaireans took Ali’s advice – given when he came down for his Rumble in the Jungle fight with George Foreman – is left for the reader to decide. My point here is that people in Benin strike me as having lots of “dignity in their poverty” – including the poorest among them.

In other words, even though majority may not boast income close to what their counterparts in Nigeria have, MANY carry themselves with pride and confidence, refuse to be talked down to or disrespected, and boldly state to anyone that there are certain dishonest acts they will not stoop to.

Don’t get me wrong: people here also do bad things – but those are generally more the exception than the norm.

Their morals and values remain quite well preserved so that certain positive behaviours continue to be encouraged and rewarded.

After reminding myself of the above, I dismissed my Nigeria-based-fears from my mind and focused on watching the handballers train.

It was well over 30 minutes later that I noticed on my phone, that the airtime receipt alert had arrived less than 10 minutes after the lady left me!

In other words, the lady-hawker did as she’d promised!

And she did so despite NOT asking for compensation of any sort from me: NOT even that I buy something from her!

Wow!

Now, if only I could boast that I would readily do what I did with this TOTAL stranger of a lady-hawker, with her counterpart in Nigeria.

If only I could proudly beat my chest that I could – and would – do it.

Sadly, much as I do not wish to make my country – or its people – look any worse than some already see it, the truth is that the chances of finding someone like that Cotonou-lady-hawker in Lagos, for instance would be very low.

Honest ones like her exist, but not in anything close to the percentage extant in Benin Republic’s Cotonou, for instance..

YOU – the reader – could put on a priest’s clothes in Lagos, and still NOT readily find anyone willing to give you money so you can send him/her airtime later on :-)

So how come these people in Benin have such an overwhelming majority of well behaved members in their society?

I believe it has to do with the fact that they have their basic needs: food, shelter, clothing and security of lives and property reasonably well taken care of. As a result, they feel no psychological pressure or desperation to get and keep/hoard as much extra as possible.

Be it petrol or electricity, food, water etc: Prices remain stable and quantities needed remain accessible/affordable for a large majority of the population, no matter how “poor” they are..

For the most part, unlike what obtains in Nigeria, the socio-economic circumstances in Benin are not in a perpetual state of negative flux – so the citizens naturally FEEL no need perpetually engage in hustling!!

When people know they do not need to rush or fight to get what they need, they stop worrying about how to get it. It is part for this reason, that people in (or from) Benin Republic often get described by Nigerians as being too laid back.

When I first arrived Cotonou in 2013, I regularly bought a plate of my favourite quick meal “Spaghetti Rouge avec Viande” (Red Spaghetti mixed with cubed meat along with a piece of bread) for 300 FCFA – which was N100 equivalent at the time.

Earlier this afternoon, 3 years on, I still ate the same meal – same quantity too – for exactly the same price.

3 years after!

In contrast, so many food items/meals have had their prices climb upwards in Nigeria since 2013. Indeed since January 2016, prices have been leaping, not just rising.

And that’s what puts psychological and financial pressure on most Nigerians, so that those who lack the required mental discipline/stamina eventually give in to the misguided impulse to do bad things.

So people are living with a mindset of desperation – and like the saying goes, desperate people do desperate things. This state of affairs is no respecter of status.

This is why many supposedly well off Nigerians baffle visiting foreigners by their willingness to readily stoop VERY low to steal any virtually any amount, from any source or anyone (like British expatriate Tim Newman let on in his article).

It’s also why some of the few Nigerians in Lagos who may be willing to do YOU a favour like the Cotonou lady did for me, would still demand you give them a tip or gift, or buy from them as a condition for doing it.

My message is that we can all rise above our circumstances – no matter how tough they might be.

No matter how hard things are, doing something dishonest will NEVER make it better. You may get a relief in the short term, but it will come back to haunt – and even bite! – you in the long run.

The wise alternative is for you to adopt a similar mindset to the one I use:

Tell yourself you will never do anything that does not edify your spirit. That you will never be guilty of failing to deliver what you promise to another. That you will never lose faith in the ability of the Creator to give you what you need, as you continue to live an upright life.

If you do that, with diligent persistence, you will NEVER lack what you truly need. Something will always come through just when it really matters most.

Take it from me: I’ve been there countless times!