2 years ago, when I first relocated to Cotonou, from Lagos, the first few months exposed me to raw cynicism from most Beninese citizens I met…and it always happened once they learned I was Nigerian.
I’ve shared several true stories about specific encounters I had, including one with a widely traveled PhD holder who was kind enough to paint the reputation Nigerians had, with his people, in vivid terms for me, using a shocking personal true story, and examples from his trips.
Only my dogged determination and persistence enabled me break down those biases that has today earned me ready friendships, and later business relations with people in that society. Many of them today tell me I’m "a very unusual kind of Nigerian".
I know they mean it as a compliment to me, but I don’t like it, because it reflects badly on my country and my people.
What’s more, I know that many Nigerians like me, abound, only they may not venture far enough for such foreign cynics to encounter them.
When I visited Ghana in 2005 for 2 weeks on business, almost nothing went right for this same reason.
My host’s brother, Paul Awuku, told me: "Tayo, it’s going to take Ghanains time to trust you. So many things have happened. Just be patient."
Back then my interest was to explore opportunities. I could not stay longer as the prospects were gloomy and I had run out of resources.
Today, I work as a Location Independent Multipreneur, choosing where to go (country wise), and how long to stay based on my preferences.
Regardless of where I am, at any point in time (I’m currently in Lagos), I can, and do sell my products and services.
Over 80% of the above happens via the web.
But what I do, the major solutions I provide, are quite uncommon/unconventional.
Examples of what I do/sell to my growing base of trusting buyers…
1. 100% customizable Excel VB software for farm businesses and others
2. Web Marketing Systems development in which I get paid to write creative content for clients that I build FREE Joomla websites (and provide webhosting) for.
3. Multidisciplinary Information Products on wide ranging topics and themes I identify to be real world relevant.
4. Paid membership website access to the above existing range of solutions, and those I plan to create in future.
But some people just won’t let go of their biases!
It’s funny yet true.
They see all I’ve built out of nothing, including rebuilding my online brand from the ashes of my snatched 9 year old domain to establish what is my highly Effective Online Presence at www.tayosolagbade.com, and they still look for excuses to cast aspersion on me.
Ever so often this happened, and I’ve accepted the need to accommodate such people with their baggage of negativity. My thinking was that they would over time discover that I’m different and acknowledge it.
Sadly, what I found is that they seem keen to find that which does not exist: a crooked Tayo Solagbade.
They betray these hidden motives often in the things they do, and especially what they say.
Well, I believe in keeping carriers of negativity at arms length, indeed much farther away if possible. So starting today, 19th February 2015, I will respond with LOUD silence to any persons who fail to accord me the same consideration and courtesy I extend to them.
For me, such displays of interpersonal ineptitude must be discouraged. I refuse to apologize for being a Nigerian. Not to other Africans or persons from outside the continent.
If you can’t deal with the fact that I proudly flaunt my Nigerian status, from my African base, while providing solutions to a global audience, without seeking approval or recognition or any external validation, then PLEASE do not contact me, because I seriously doubt we would get along!