Category Archives: Domestic Violence Against Men (DVAM)

[DVAM] The 3 Types Of Nagging That DESTROY Your Marriage

Expert author, Carin Goldstein MFT of YourTango dot com discusses 3 ways in which a woman can – unintentionally – use nagging to destroy her marriage.

[DVAM] The 3 Types Of Nagging That DESTROY Your Marriage

If nothing or no one is ever good enough for you, consider the common denominator.

“You actually call this making the bed?! This is ridiculous. You need to do it the way I do it.”

“Will you turn the TV off already and help me get these wet, naked children out of the bath?!”

“Thanks for not giving me a kiss goodbye this morning… You know, it would be nice if you thought about me before leaving!”

Do any of the above comments sound familiar? Perhaps the above are something you are nagging your husband with on a daily basis? Are you feeling like a broken record as you continue to repeat yourself while he continues to quietly dismiss the sound (dare I say “the noise”?) of your nagging — only to leave you feeling more dismissed by than ever? If the answer is yes, then allow me to remind you this: It takes two to tango. That being said, part one of the issue is, yes, he’s either not doing things the same way as you or not listening to you.

nagging-types

Continue…

https://www.yourtango.com/2013199135/nagging

[DVAM] Top 10 Things Women Do To Destroy Their Marriage

In the article previewed/linked below (based on my Facebook page’s theme of Domestic Violence Against Men – DVAM), Deborah Demander of pairedlife dot com shares 10 powerful insights about how (some) women inadvertently destroy their marriages with their own hands.

Top 10 Things Women Do To Destroy Their Marriage

Wives bear as much responsibility as husbands. We have the power to make a home, or break it.

How we hurt our husbands

Creating a hostile environment can make everyone uncomfortable and destroy your marriage.

While both husband and wife should take responsibility for their part in a marriage, below are ten mistakes common to women, which can completely destroy a marriage. When women exercise the following behaviors, it can create a hostile environment, where no one feels safe or comfortable.

Continue…

10-things-women-do

https://pairedlife.com/problems/Top-10-Things-Women-Do-To-Destroy-Their-Marriage

PII 113 [AUDIO]: 1. One Serious Mistake Gov Ambode Needs to Stop Making If He Wants to Stop Domestic Violence | 2. Just Before You Blindly Join In Pointing Accusing Fingers at A Man Accused of Domestic Violence

In a few days from now (13th April 2018 to be exact), my “Domestic Violence Against Men – Ideas for Identifying and Stopping It” Facebook page will clock 1 year (12 months) old, since I launched it.

During the past year, it’s been interesting to see people following the page despite the fact that I have not gone out of my way to create ANY awareness about it, other than publishing new content every other month or so. More interesting has been the fact that those who have LIKED the page have been BOTH male and female!

SCROLL DOWN TO READ THE FULL ISSUE

Tayo Solagbade's Performance Improvement IDEAS(PI Squared) Newsletter

Tayo Solagbade’s
Performance Improvement 
IDEAS
(PI Squared) Newsletter

Monday 9th April 2018

Logo - Tayo Solagbade's Self-Development Academy


NB: This PI Squared newsletter will be published weekly, on Mondays, in place of the Speaking/Web Marketing IDEAS newsletter, starting from today – 15th February 2016.
 I’m reinventing my Monday newsletter content and theme, to accommodate my vision of serving the growing audience of serious minded individuals and organizations reaching out to me, with information, education. news and research findings designed to help them do what they do better.

************

View Tayo Solagbade's video tutorials and demonstrations on Facebook Productivity Tips, Web Marketing, and for his Custom MS Excel-VB driven software applicationsJoin the SD Nuggets community on Facebook.comConnect with Tayo on Twitter.comConnect with Tayo on Google PlusConnect with Tayo on LinkedIn.com

PII 113 [AUDIO]: 1. One Serious Mistake Gov Ambode Needs to Stop Making If He Wants to Stop Domestic Violence | 2. Just Before You Blindly Join In Pointing Accusing Fingers at A Man Accused of Domestic Violence

In a few days from now (13th April 2018 to be exact), my “Domestic Violence Against Men – Ideas for Identifying and Stopping It” Facebook page will clock 1 year (12 months) old, since I launched it.

During the past year, it’s been interesting to see people following the page despite the fact that I have not gone out of my way to create ANY awareness about it, other than publishing new content every other month or so. More interesting has been the fact that those who have LIKED the page have been BOTH male and female!

The above tells me that this page’s message resonates with growing number of people.

On my part, as I note in the 2 audio podcasts I’ve just published in my SoundCloud.com channel, there are MANY men who are suffering in silence as victims of Domestic Violence, because little if at all ANY provision is made to address their needs where it relates to a situation in which their intimate FEMALE partners are the aggressors/abusers in the relationshop.

For those not aware of it, DVAM is a BIG problem that is hidden because few men have the courage to report it, and also because most of those assigned to tackle issues of Domestic Violence tend to focus on Women and Children to the exclusion of men.

My purpose is to influence a change in that narrative – and I AM using my platform here at TayoSolagbade.com to do what I can to draw attention to the need for a change in this trend that currently exists which puts men at a disadvantage.

Click the links below to listen to my 2 messages…

1. https://soundcloud.com/tayo-solagbade/one-serious-mistake-gov-ambode-needs-to-stop-making-if-he-want-to-succeed-with-his-campaign-against-domestic-violence

2. https://soundcloud.com/tayo-solagbade/just-before-you-blindly-join-in-pointing-accusing-fingers

Below: Screenshot of the 2 audio podcasts I just published in my SoundCloud.com Channel

dvam-audio

Related Article:

[DVAM] Woman As Aggressor: The Unspoken Truth Of Domestic Violence [There’s something very important that we’re not talking about when we talk about domestic violence. by Edward Rhymes]

Excel-VB Driven Ration Formulator

Click to view larger screenshot

1. Click here to learn more about this app – watch demo videos etc

2.Click here to watch a 4 part video in which I demonstrate how to use this app to formulate rations using real life data sent to me by an Algerian PhD student.

Click here to contact me about purchasing this product.

EXCEL-VB DRIVEN POULTRY LAYER FARM MANAGER SOFTWARE

Click here to download a detailed PDF user guide and watch 15 screen shot user guide tutorials of the Monthly Poultry Farm Manager that I now offer Farm CEOs.

Click here to watch a screenshot demonstration of the Excel-VB Driven Poultry Farm Manager I built for a client farm business in Ekiti state, South West Nigeria.

Click here to contact me about purchasing this product.

SDN Blog™

New posts from last week*

Monday:

N/A

[Thursday]:

N/A

[Friday]:

N/A

[Saturday]:

N/A

[Sunday]:

N/A

Tayo K. Solagbade*

Self-Development/Performance Improvement Specialist and Multipreneur

*Best Practice Farm Business Support Specialist & Founder of the MS Excel Heaven Visual Basic Automation Club and Competition

Mobile: +234-803-302-1263 (in Nigeria) or +229-66-122-136 (in Benin Republic)

http://www.tayosolagbade.com

Tayo K. Solagbade is a Location Independent Performance Improvement Specialist and Multipreneur (i.e. a highly versatile/multi-skilled entrepreneur), with a bias for delivering Best Practice solutions to Farm Businesses and others.

Since 2002, he has earned multiple streams of income providing individuals and organizations with personal development training and coaching, custom MS Excel-VB solutionsweb marketing systems/ web hosting, freelance writing services, and best practice extension support services (for farm business owners).

Tayo is the author of the Self-Development (SD) Bible™ and the popular Livestock Feed Formulation Handbook. He is also the developer of its accompanying Excel-VB driven Ration Formulator™ and the Poultry Farm Manager™ software.

He has delivered talks/papers to audiences in various groups and organizations, including the Centre for Management Development, University of Lagos, Christ Baptist Church, Volunteer Corps, Tantalisers Fast Foods and others.

In May 2012 he was the Guest Speaker at the Centre for Entrepreneurship Development’s Annual Semester Entrepreneurial Lecture at Yaba College of Technology in Lagos.

On 1st April 2013, Tayo (who reads, write and speaks the French language) relocated to Cotonou, Benin Republic to begin slowly traveling across the West African region.

His key purpose is to deliver talks, seminars and workshops on his key areas of focus and interest to interested audiences (Email tayo at tksola dot com for details).

In a previous life, before leaving to become self-employed, Tayo served for seven years (October 1994 to December 2001) as a high performing manager in Guinness Nigeria. He rose from Shift Brewer to Training & Technical Development Manager, and later acted in senior roles as Production Manager and Technical Manager.

In addition to constantly challenging the status quo and influencing positive work changes, he built a reputation for using self-taught spreadsheet programming skills (starting with Lotus 1-2-3, and later moving to Excel Visual Basic) – in his spare time – to develop Automated Spreadsheet Applications to computerize manual report generation processes in the departments he worked. Over four(4) of his applications were adopted for brewery level reporting.

Tayo holds a B.Sc degree in Agricultural Extension Services from the University of Ibadan, Nigeria, having graduated top of his class – with Second Class Upper Division honors – in 1992. He is an Associate Member of the UK Institute & Guild of Brewing, a 1997 National Finalist of the Nigerian Institute of Management’s(NIM) Young Managers’ competition, a Certified Psychometric Test Administrator for Psytech UK, innovator of Spontaneous Coaching for Self-Development™ (SCfS-D™), and Founder of the Self-Development Academy (SDAc).

When he’s not amazing clients with his superhuman skills (wink), Tayo works as the creative force behind his Daily Self-Development Nuggets blog – on which he also publishes The Farm CEO Weekly Newspaper (sent via email to paid subscribers) and his Weekly Performance Improvement IDEAS newsletter.

You can connect with him on Twitter @tksola.com and Facebook.

Visit Tayo Solagbade Dot Com, to download over over 10 performance improvement resources to boost your personal and work related productivity.

====
[IMPORTANT NOTE:====

On 4th May 2014, Tayo’s 9 year old domain (Spontaneousdevelopment dot com), which hosted his website, was taken over by Aplus.net.

Within a few days however, Tayo used his advanced self-taught web development skills to build a SUPERIOR “reincarnation” of it the website http://www.tayosolagbade.com.

But updates are still ongoing to URLs bearing the old domain name in most of the over 1,000 web pages, and blog posts he’s published.

If you experience any difficulties finding a page or document, email Tayo at tksola dot com.

Click “Tayo, What Happened to SpontaneousDevelopmentDotCom ?” to read a detailed narrative about how the above event occurred :-))

Here’s an article Tayo wrote, to inspire others to defy adversity, and bounce back to even greater reckoning at what they do EVERY time:

Succeed by Emerging from Adversity Like a Phoenix

(TayoSolagbade.com launches extra Hosting plan with FREE Web Marketing!)

And he wrote the one below, to explain why losing a domain name, no matter how old, NO LONGER determines your online success or otherwise:

A Proven Strategy to Find Profitable Buyers Regardless of Your Domain Name
==================

View Tayo Solagbade's video tutorials and demonstrations on Facebook Productivity Tips, Web Marketing, and for his Custom MS Excel-VB driven software applicationsJoin the SD Nuggets community on Facebook.comConnect with Tayo on Twitter.comConnect with Tayo on Google PlusConnect with Tayo on LinkedIn.com

Home |About | Contact | SD Nuggets™ | Speaking/Web Marketing IDEAS | Web Marketing Systems | Freelance Writing | MS Excel® Heaven™ | Cost-Saving Farm Biz Ideas

audience profile. I can help to research and investigate the market there, to get firmer details of what it will take to get started etc.

[RECOMMENDED] Do You Know How To Deal With People Who Mock And Ridicule You? (Syndicated Version)

I wrote this article over a decade ago, less than 5 years after I quit my job to become self-employed. It was a period when I was experiencing a lot of repeat rejection from potential clients, especially as I tried to find buyers for my Excel-Visual Basic Automation solutions.

Many people simply ignored me (or my letters/flyers) while some walked me out of their offices.

But some went out of their way, to mock and ridicule me in ways that remain so painful for me to remember even now.

I will however add that what they was what I ended up using to inspire myself to succeed in creating a lucrative niche market for my Excel Heaven Visual Basic Automation products and services – which have since been purchased by clients within and outside Africa.

Read this article (which has been widely syndicated online – see examples here) to learn the exact ideas I used to enable myself to succeed inspite of ANY mockery and ridicule directed at me. Apply them as recommended and you WILL become UNSTOPPABLE, like I am!

mock

[DVAM] Woman As Aggressor: The Unspoken Truth Of Domestic Violence [There’s something very important that we’re not talking about when we talk about domestic violence. by Edward Rhymes]

I continue my STOP Domestic Violence Against Men (DVAM) Campaign by featuring this powerfully eye opening report about a serious aspect of the Domestic Violence epidemic that most of society is missing – but thankfully, MORE and MORE experts are beginning to identify and call attention to i.e. that women have been found, many times to BE the abuser in cases of DV, and we need to address SUCH situations!

Woman As Aggressor: The Unspoken Truth Of Domestic Violence [There’s something very important that we’re not talking about when we talk about domestic violence.  by Edward Rhymes]

Let’s put this into perspective: a significant amount of the findings regarding male-as-victim intimate partner violence came about as the result of studies and surveys that were aimed at understanding domestic violence against women. These are not studies conducted by rabid anti-women men’s groups or right-wing think tanks. They were conducted by organizations like the Centers for Disease Control, National Institutes of Health, the American Sociological Association, Psychology of Women Quarterly and the American Journal of Public Health, to name a few.

Read full report:

https://www.mintpressnews.com/woman-aggressor-unspoken-truth-domestic-violence/196746/

LIKE OUR DVAM Advocacy page at https://facebook.com/stopdvambytks/

dvam

[DVAM NEWS UPDATE – FEATURE STORY] Man Reports Female Partner for Domestic Violence BUT Gets NAMED the Abuser, based on Lies & Edited Video Cooked Up by His Partner!

When Ade had first visited that office, a female officer of the agency has loudly stated, in a surprised tone, that Ade would be the very first man she would ever encounter coming for their help. To her, it was something that seemed almost impossible. The letter in her hand however suggested otherwise.

dvam-news

DOWNLOAD THE PDF VERSION

Get the PDF version of this newsletter emailed to you. Simply LIKE OUR DVAM Advocacy page at https://facebook.com/stopdvambytks/  and send us a message.

[DVAM] VIDEO – Maryam Sanda arrested for stabbing husband to death [vanguardngr dot com – NOVEMBER 21, 201710:06 AM]

Maryam Sanda arrested for stabbing husband to death [vanguardngr dot com – NOVEMBER 21, 201710:06 AM]

The Nigerian Police has confirmed the arrest of Maryam Sanda for allegedly stabbing her husband, Haliru Bello to death (on Sunday morning the 19th of November 2017). Bello, 35, son of Haliru Bello, a former chairman of the Peoples’ Democratic Party (PDP) has been buried according to Islamic rites in Abuja, after prayers at the National Mosque.

According to reports, it was not the first time Maryam  would attack Bello violently. She once  bit part of his ear off  during an argument. Bello was treated at a hospital before returning home. Some report said he was advised to leave the house but he refused, only to be brutally attacked the second time.

Read more at: https://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/11/maryam-sanda-arrested-stabbing-husband-death/

hubby-stabbing



 

[DVAM] Incredible! Wives Batter 55 Husbands In Lagos

[DVAM] Incredible! Wives Batter 55 Husbands In Lagos

This may sound incredible, but it is true, 55 husbands have reported to the Lagos State Government how their wives battered them in renewed cases of domestic violence in the state.

Continue…

woman-1-e1504628185776

[DVAM] REAL MEN DO CRY ABOUT ABUSE

Date: January 1, 1970:

The article looks at male abuse. It states that though men are not as likely to fall victim to abuse as women, they are not immune to it and sadly those that are abused are unlikely to speak out because of fear of losing face.

This article may be used to:

> Highlight how abuse has been mainstreamed in the media.

> Challenge perceptions that men are immune to abuse.

> As an example of a good piece of journalism

> As an example of gender sensitive language.

> Highlight different types of abuse

> Raise discussion about the gendered nature of abuse.

Continue:

http://genderlinks.org.za/programme-web-menu/real-men-do-cry-about-abuse-2009-03-31/

[DVAM] Nigerian man narrates the domestic violence he faced in his wife’s hands

Nigerian man narrates the domestic violence he faced in his wife’s hands

STORY HIGHLIGHTS

What happens when the victim is a man?

It is not so often that we hear cases of men facing domestic violence in their homes.

It is usually women who have to suffer the terrible ordeal, sometimes suffering their pain in silence, other times finding courage to speak up or flee the situation.

What happens when it is a man? Who defends or even believes them? How do they go about speaking about their problem without sounding like weaklings or attention-seeking liars?

A Nigerian man, @rosanwo, living in the diaspora got the courage to speak up about his case on social media, and as expected, many discouraged him and asked him to find a better medium to air his dirty linen, while some supported and sent him kind words.

Find his story below:

http://thenet.ng/2017/01/nigerian-man-narrates-the-domestic-violence-he-faced-in-the-hands-of-his-wife/

dvam-nigerian-man

LIKE MY PAGE AND LEARN MORE…

Click the image below (or HERE) to visit and LIKE my page where you can read more true stories about and LEARN how to identify AND stop Domestic Violence Against Men

[DVAM] Your Silence May Cause Your Son, Brother, Uncle, Dad or Other Male Loved Ones to Suffer Avoidable Domestic Violence [Hint: Read These True Stories from batteredmen dot com]

Do you ignore efforts to Identify and Stop Domestic Violence Against Men (DVAM)? Let’s hope your silence (or indifference) does not cause your son, brother, uncle, dad or other male loved ones to suffer like those who tell their stories on batteredmen dot com featured here:

stopdvam-fbk-banner